M. Evelina Galang, The Look-Alike Women

Welcome all!

I am a student in MA English at Chiang Mai University, Chiang Mai, Thailand. You will learn more about me at “My bio.”

This purpose of publishing this website is to publicize my works during four years in MA English classes in the “Project List”, I would introduce to the course I learned. Besides, I have been reading many books in various genres which are reviewed in the category called, “Book Review.” Despite that, my independent study entitled, “Effects of the Dislocation of the Traditional Chinese Mothering on the Mother-Daughter Relationship in Amy Tan’s The Bonesetter’s Daughter,” can also be found in “My Independent Study.”

However, my blog is under construction because I have to gather all information mentioned above. Please be patient. I will updates them all soon.

Please acknowledge that my independent study has a copyright which belongs to Chiang Mai University. If you want to cite any words in this website, please kindly give some credit to my independent study.

Here is an MLA style citation for my independent study.

Pawinee Nimanussornkul. “Effects of the Dislocation of the Traditional Chinese Mothering on the Mother-Daughter Relationship in Amy Tan’s The Bonesetter’s Daughter.” M.A. Independent study, Chiang Mai University, 2009.

Author Miss Pawinee Nimanussornkul

Degree Master of Arts (English)

Independent Study Advisory Committee

Lect. Dr. Chalathip Wasuwat            Chairperson

Assoc. Prof. Somporn Varnado           Member

Asst. Prof. Dr. Wilailak Saraithong       Member

ABSTRACT

This research aims to explore the effects of the dislocation of traditional Chinese mothering on the mother-daughter relationship as portrayed in Amy Tan’s The Bonesetter’s Daughter. Ruth represents the in-between position of Chinese American daughter, who claims her American identity instead of Chinese. She has to struggle over conflicts with her Chinese immigrant mother LuLing, who adheres to the traditional Chinese mothering.

The results of this research reveal that mother is always the beginning. At first, the mother’s identity enables the daughter to form her half Chinese identity in a way of the traditional Chinese culture. Besides, the mother’s dislocation of traditional Chinese mothering also initiates the conflicts between the Chinese mother and her Chinese American daughter. Nevertheless, the mother is also the one who takes the first step in finding solution for her daughter’s problems and becomes the one who solves all the conflicts.

This research will enable the reader to understand the root of the conflicts between Chinese immigrant mother and her Chinese American daughter originate, and how they choose to cope with the conflicts. The novel indicates that the Chinese immigrant mother only needs daughter to see her important in order to pass on the traditional Chinese mothering. The mother also needs to establish a strong bond with her daughter. Meanwhile, the daughter has adopted the American culture in search of her identity and freedom from her mother’s controlling.

However, Tan suggests three solutions to the mother-daughter conflict, which are (1) the daughter’s reading her mother written stories, (2) the mother’s taking the first step in mending their broken relationship, and (3) the mother’s asking her daughter for forgiveness. The first two solutions enable the daughter to understand her mother’s mothering behavior, while the last solution heals their broken relationship through speaking out their true feelings. The novel also suggests that the daughter, too, needs to express her feeling to reconcile with her mother.

Copyright© Chiang Mai University, September 21st, 2009

INTRODUCTION

This chapter introduces how the idea of conducting this research is developed. It also includes the purposes of the study, research questions, scope of the study, definitions of terms, and educational advantages. Moreover, the organization of the study is precisely explained to give the reader the idea of what will be discussed in each chapter.

1.1. Rationale and Significance of the Problem

Every family has conflicts, and it cannot be denied that the conflicts are the results of the relationship of the members of the family, nuclear or extended. The conflicts can result from husband-wife relationship, mothering, or even interference from members, friends, or in-laws of the families. Moreover, conflicts can take the forms of verbal, emotional, or physical abuse. Besides, methods for resolving or settling conflicts differ from family to family and from culture to culture. According to Cynthia Crosson Tower (1993), no matter what the culture is, society has particular expectations of a family and when those expectations are not met, the society is entitled to intervene. However, there are various factors in today’s culture such as increased mobility, isolation of families, and affluent lifestyles which can alter families’ functioning, especially the socialization process.

As for women, their process of socialization is crucially dependent upon their mothers. When considering various kinds of relationship women experience over their lifespan, the bonding between mother and daughter is undeniably the most important. In learning how to best become a successful member of society, daughters usually look at their mothers to demonstrate the behavior and beliefs appropriate to a woman. Such explicit and implicit instructions that daughters learn from their mothers make the mother-daughter relationship a central one in the socialization of women. However, in a feminist viewpoint the strong bonding between mother and daughter is undermined by the patriarchal power. According to Zillah Eisenstein, the patriarchy, a system of oppression, aims to “destroy women’s consciousness about her potential power, which derives from the necessity of society to reproduce itself” (1981: 14). Consider the Chinese family system as an example. Chinese people value the family that is hierarchically organized and calculated through men.

Chinese are well known as a family oriented people who consider men as being superior to women. As a result, traditional Chinese family values only sons and considers daughters the outsiders because they cannot earn money to support the family. Living with such traditional Chinese values makes Chinese women suffer, let alone other Chinese women who grow up with these values in a culturally diverse environment other than China. These Chinese women, of course, desperately need support from their mothers, who play significant role in socializing and forming the daughters’ cultural identity.

Naturally, all mother-daughter relationships are complicated and crucial to the daughter’s development of self. Nonetheless, as Eisenstein argues, the bonding between mother and daughter becomes even more essential when both mother and daughter experience cultural, linguistic, and historical disconnect, besides other common women’s issues (1981: 16). This research argues that the relationship between Chinese mothers and their daughters born and grow up in the U.S. is not only interesting but also worth studying. Living in a new environment requires that the mother have strong personality. This is because when Chinese women emigrate to the U.S., they have to leave the traditional Chinese family system behind. They become the first female in the households in charge of taking care of the children and earning money. There is no need for them to be subordinate to the husbands’ mothers, who are left in China. These Chinese immigrant women take all the control over the people in their homes. Therefore, they become more responsible for helping their children to do well in the American society. Living in a new social and cultural environment, the Chinese immigrant mothers have to work hard both to raise their children and support their family with money. Besides struggling to overcome the language barrier, these Chinese mothers often find it more burdensome to face discrimination and cultural dislocation.

As for their young daughters, who were born in the U.S., growing up in the U.S. is not easy either. They cannot deny their Chinese heritage and therefore have to mediate between the two cultures, American and Chinese. Growing up as Chinese American daughters is not only difficult, but it can also be painful. As we know, adolescence is a critical period of life. These Chinese American daughters have to undergo several processes that happen simultaneously. For one thing, being teenagers, the Chinese American daughters become most self-conscious about being pulled in opposite directions by both Chinese and American cultures. On the one hand, these Chinese American daughters, like other ethnic minorities in the U.S., try to be assimilated into the mainstream society. Born in the U.S., the first generation of Chinese American daughters are brought up by Chinese parents with Chinese ways of thinking. They are neither pure blood American because of their Chinese parents nor real Chinese due to their social environment from which they grow up. Moreover, their American friends often feel that they are the “Others” as they possess the Asian looks. The Otherness that most Chinese American daughters experience significantly results from Chinese mothering because most Chinese immigrants in the U.S. still adhere to the traditional Chinese values and impose those values on their children while raising them. Desperately need to be recognized as Americans, these Chinese daughters cannot help rebelling against their mothers which oftentimes leads to the misunderstanding that they are rejecting Chinese culture. Thus, the relationship between mothers and daughters tend to become problematic. Meanwhile, the experience of being alienated from both the American and the Chinese societies makes these Chinese youngsters helplessly turn to their mothers who, taking the role of cultural carriers, connect them to their ethnic heritage. As Preselfannie W. McDaniels (2004) indicates, most Chinese American daughters admit that their mothers were the primary factor influencing their desire to search for their cultural roots and that they need their mothers to take the first step in mending the relationship between them and their mothers. At the same time, the mothers need great understanding and forgiveness from their daughters. McDaniels postulates that Chinese mother hopes that telling her story about the past and the present can become mediums for reducing the gaps between herself and her daughter (2004: 127). Therefore, the forgiveness from Chinese American daughter is perceived as one of the most successful coping strategies in the mother-daughter conflict.

Writing is another strategy employed by many Chinese American daughters attempting to restore the mother-daughter relationship. Chinese women authors like Maxine Hong Kingston, Jade Snow Wong, and Amy Tan have made significant interventions into the discourse on Asian American identity by showing how perpetual American immigrant problems of first generation and their children take on a distinctive character for Chinese American. Living with their Chinese immigrant mothers, many Chinese American women authors feel that they have to trace back to the family’s history in order to understand their other identity. Some start to write about their mothers’ past. While writing biographies of their mothers, these authors find that the facts of their mothers’ struggling lives in the motherland help them understand their mothers’ actions and decisions and finally enable them to reconcile with not only their mothers but also their Chinese identity. For these Chinese Americans, writing novels about their motherland from which they did not grow up takes great efforts. These writers have to build up their descriptions of the motherland from their mothers’ stories and memories and, of course, from their imaginations. This method of writing is known as writing an “imaginary homeland” (Salman Rusdie, 1981).

Among the various types of Chinese American literature, autobiographical writing has drawn much attention from researchers to investigate those works by Chinese American female authors who were brought up by immigrant mothers (Liland, 2002; Byrne, 2005; Pu, 2006). These autobiographical writings often present cultural and intergenerational conflicts between mothers and daughters. In writing back to their imaginary homeland, these writers undergo a healing process, which Gro Mari Liland calls, the “cultural mediation” (2002: 3). In her research entitled “Cultural Mediations in Chinese American Literature: First and Second Immigrant Writings,” Liland (2002) confirms that Chinese American women were doubly marginalized and suppressed by both their own culture and by American mainstream culture. Liland reveals how personal and communal identities are constructed and shaped in and through different types of narrative taken from the life stories of several Chinese American women authors, as in the autobiographies of Jade Snow Wong’s Fifth Chinese Daughter, Elaine M. Mars’ Paper Daughter: A Memoir, Fae Myenne Ng’s Bone and The Bonesetter’s Daughter by Amy Tan. Using their cultural heritage, family life, ethnicity, and growing up processes as sources of materials, these contemporary Chinese American women authors mediate themselves by writing back about their imaginary homeland. Their writings reflect not only how these authors struggle with their “hyphenated identity” but also their search of a balance between parental expectations and social norms. As Elizabeth Byrne (2005) indicates, the processes of researching their ancestral history and traditional customs help the Chinese American authors reconcile with their identity.

As mentioned earlier, in the situation in which both mother and daughter are disconnected from their cultural roots, the mother plays a very significant role in forming the daughter’s identity. It would be interesting to look into the relationship between the construction of the hyphenated identity of a Chinese American daughter and the traditional Chinese mothering as revealed in The Bonesetter’s Daughter, a semi-biographical narrative of Amy Tan. This research aims to investigate the portrayal of Chinese mother-daughter relationship in the American society, and to find out how dislocation of traditional Chinese mothering affects the mother-daughter relationship. The Bonesetter’s Daughter is a story of three different generations of a Chinese family: Auntie Precious who was born and raised in China; LuLing who was raised in China with traditional Chinese parenting style and immigrate to live in America; and Ruth who was born and raised in America by her mother LuLing who is greatly influenced by traditional Chinese parenting style. The Bonesetter’s Daughter complicates the story of mother-daughter relationship by emphasizing the act of writing as a means of self-empowerment on the mother-daughter relationship. The writing also constitutes the effect of maternal narratives from the mother’s diary and stories on the identity transformation of the daughters. Moreover, The Bonesetter’s Daughter demonstrates the impacts of Chinese mothering on daughters’ lives such as their mate-preference, self-determination, assimilation, and career selection.

To profoundly understand the mother-daughter relationship in Tan’s novel, it is essential to consult the recent study on the comparison between Chinese immigrant and European American mothering cultural values done by Ruth K. Chao (1995). In “Chinese and European American Cultural Models of the Self-Reflected in Mother’s Child-Rearing Beliefs,” Chao indicates that the European-American view of mother’s child-rearing and from that the Chinese-American are different. While the European American mothering stresses the importance of family and community, the Chinese American mothering aims to maintain Chinese culture or ethnic identity. According to Chao, socialization goals of Chinese immigrant mothers were consistent with an interdependent and collectivistic orientation of Asian culture. Chinese immigrant mothers emphasized interdependence by encouraging their children to have high education achievement to bring the honor to the family. In contrast, European-American mothers emphasized their children to have the sense of self-esteem, specifically the idea of being well as individual. In the researcher’s analysis of The Bonesetter’s Daughter, these contrasting concepts of childrearing will be taken into consideration.

1.2. Purpose of the Study

The main purpose of this study is to investigate the portrayal of Chinese mother-daughter relationship in the American society to find out how the dislocation of traditional Chinese mothering affects the mother-daughter relationship.

1.3. Research Questions

1.3.1.      How does the dislocation of traditional Chinese mothering affect the mother-daughter relationship?

1.3.2.      How does the conflict between mother and daughter affect their relationships?

1.4. Scope of Study

Amy Tan’s The Bonesetter’s Daughter published in 2001 by the Random House Publishing Group. The story is narrated by a Chinese American daughter, Ruth Luyi Young, LuLing Liu Young, and Gu Liu Xing which comprises 17 complicated chapters grouped into three parts. In part one, each chapter names after the number from one to seven. Part two consists of seven chapters: Heart, Change, Ghost, Destiny, Effortless, Character, and Fragrance. Part three contains three chapters named after the number from one to three. The book is also added up the prologue named “Truth,” and the “Epilogue” at the end.

1.5. Definitions of Terms

1.5.1. Authoritarian parenting style: a way of raising a child described by high levels of control but low levels of warmth and responsiveness and democratic reasoning. (Chao, 2002)

1.5.2. Authoritative parenting style: a way of raising a child described by high levels of demandingness, responsiveness, and democratic reasoning. (Chao, 2002)

1.5.3. Confucianism: a philosophical system developed by the Chinese philosopher about 2,500 years ago involving traditional values and praiseworthy manners of Chinese people

1.5.4. Cultural upbringing: a treatment and instruction according to particular culture received by a child from his/her parents throughout his/her childhood (Miriam-Webster)

1.5.5. Mothering: a process to care for or protect a child or children like a mother (Miriam-Webster)

1.5.6. Mother-daughter relationship: a combination of behavior, feelings, and expectations, which are unique to a particular parent and a particular child. (Wodak, 1986)

1.6. Educational Advantages

1.6.1. To gain more understanding on the social and cultural issues related to the mother-daughter relationship

1.6.1.1. Effects of the mainstream American culture on a Chinese American daughter growing up with the widowed Chinese mother

1.6.1.2. Writing autobiography as a possible resolution of the conflict between mothers and daughters

1.6.2. To provide another perspective on cultural upbringing and influences of dominant culture through an analysis of a literary text

1.7. Organization of the Study

The analysis of Amy Tan’s The Bonesetter’s Daughter regarding the effects of the dislocation of traditional Chinese mothering on the mother-daughter relationship can be divided into six chapters.

1.7.1. Chapter One “Introduction” discusses the general information of the study including background, statement of the problem, purpose of the study, research questions, scope of the study, definitions of terms, educational advantages and organization of the study.

1.7.2. Chapter Two “Literature Review” presents relevant studies concerning the problem of Chinese children grown up with a single parent, the Chinese mothering, previous studies on Amy Tan’s The Bonesetter’s Daughter and Amy Tan’s other novels, and the synopsis of The Bonesetter’s Daughter.

1.7.3. Chapter Three “Theoretical Framework” gives explanation about the methodology used in the study, based on Ruth K. Chao’s studies of Chinese immigrant mothering and European American mothering.

1.7.4. Chapter Four “Analysis of Amy Tan’s The Bonesetter’s Daughter” is based on the Ruth K. Chao’s studies of Chinese immigrant mothering and the discussion about how the dislocation of the traditional Chinese mothering affects the mother-daughter relationship.

1.7.5. Chapter Five “Conclusion” comprises the conclusion of the study and recommendation for further study.

Copyright© Chiang Mai University, September 21st, 2009

LITERATURE REVIEW

The scope of literature review includes the following topics:

2.1 Family Structure and Children Outcomes

2.2 Chinese Mothering

2.3 Previous Studies on Amy Tan’s The Bonesetter’s Daughter

2.4 Previous Studies on Amy Tan’s Other Works

2.1. Family Structure and Children Outcomes

Societies have changed significantly over the decades. These changes have altered the families’ functioning, which eventually puts more stress on the parents to form the family structure. Studies suggest that the changes in Chinese family structure, which can influence or damage the children outcomes, can result from five factors: the modernization that shapes the family members’ behaviors, the Confucian values that form the new family structure in China and Japan, the fracture of family structure that establishes the children educational outcomes, the state of being a single mother who has more stress in raising their children, and the ethnicity of the family that affects the parenting style and children outcomes (McLanahan,1983; Chao, 1994; Kuroda, 1994; Schneider, 2005; Phoenix and Husain, 2007).

Family is a universal system and a basic unit of all societies, but its forms and functions are influenced by the social, economic, cultural, and political systems of particular countries, and even vary within local areas of individual countries. In most Chinese families, parents provide their children with the early education and shape their personalities, values and beliefs. These values, ideas and perspectives that Chinese children receive in the early stage of life will greatly affect their attitude and behavior in the future. Changes of family structure not only characterize the parenting style but also affect the children outcomes. As Ruth K. Chao indicates, changes in family composition due to modernization and urbanization may cause relationships among family members to change as well, but family relationships in different societies, such as Chinese society and American society, evolve in different ways (1994). The conflicts between Chinese immigrant mothers and Chinese American daughter, which is caused by the differences of two cultures, are portrayed in Tan’s The Bonesetter’s Daughter. In order to understand the differences of Chinese and American cultures better, it is necessary to make a comparison between Chinese and American family values. In terms of cultural impact on the family structure, childrearing in some countries such as China is considered as the protective nurturing. The protective nurturing refers to the excessive fostering that the Chinese mothers offer to their children, and it tends to be too protective than the children expect. In the U.S., children learn to be individualistic, which will help them to survive in the diverse surroundings. On the other hand, children in China, where Confucian values have power to control the culture, are strictly taught to obey the parents, and have strict manner in every move.

The Confucian values which presumably shape the child outcomes have influenced the family structure in China and Japan. In general, the family structure of China and Japan are internationally regarded as extended family and hierarchically organized. Because of globalization and social changes, scholars believe that the social and cultural values might have been changed. Toshio Kuroda’s article (1994), “Family Structure and Social Change: Implications of Fertility Changes in Japan and China,” asserts that the dominant family structure in China and Japan is influenced by the Confucian values, but the political and economic systems of the two countries are completely different. After Kuroda has done quantitative study to investigate the changes found in dominant family structure, he concludes that the dominant family structure in China and Japan is not that of an extended family as it was misperceived. He also indicates that after World War II, the family structure in the two countries becomes the nuclear family rather than extended family as a result of the influences of the Western cultural values (54). Kurada believes that the changes in family structure of China and Japan, which is powerfully influenced by the Confucian values and the Western cultural values, can shape the children’s behaviors as these values enable them to adjust themselves to new lifestyle and new thinking.

In general, the family structure plays an important role in determining children’s education achievement and their psychological well-being. In Family Matters: Family Structure and Child Outcomes, Barbara Schneider (2005) remarks that fracture of family structure has significant effects on the academic experiences and the social development of children. The study points out that the children with single mothers tend to have more behavioral problems in schools than those from intact families. For example, students from single parent families “miss school, are tardy and cut class about 30 percent more often than students from intact families” (19). As Schneider puts it, the changes in family structure can affect children’s psychological well-being and social behaviors. The effects vary from “school misbehavior to more risky behaviors such as smoking, drug use, and teen pregnancy” (18). In addition, the frequencies of family conflicts can also cause the children to misbehave in finding solution for their own problems. These misbehaviors will lead the children with single mothers to be unable to deal with troubles in any circumstances throughout their lives.

Truly, a single mother has to both nurture her child and earn money for financial support. Therefore, single female heads of the family experience more stress than their married male counterparts, who raise their children alone. Having examined the relationship between family headship and stress, McLannahan (1994) points out that the single female heads with children experience more stress than their married male counterparts in all three areas: the presence of chronic life strains, the occurrence of major life events, and the absence of social and psychological supports. McLannahan also adds that the trauma experienced by female heads cause them to have “more difficulty monitoring their children” than those parents from intact families, who cooperate the parenting and are able to share the stress while raising their children (347). For a woman, who grows up with difficulties during her childhood, becoming a mother is difficult. However, being a mother becomes even more difficult for a Chinese immigrant woman relocating to the U.S. who has to struggle both to survive in a foreign land and to raise her children on her own.

In addition, the ethnicity of the parents significantly takes influence parenting styles. In “Parenting and Ethnicity,” Ann Phoenix and Fatima Husain (2007) presented ideas on how the ethnicity of the family would lead to the changes in family. Numbers of studies about parenting and ethnicity have the same conclusion that each parenting style has affected the child outcomes differently. The study postulates that the authoritative parenting style, which is common for American parents, is regarded as the ideal parenting style. On the other hand, according to the study, the authoritarian parenting, which is applied in African and Asian family, is beneficial only for Asian Americans. Phoenix and Husain observed that there were various contextual factors in shaping the parenting style, for example, “transnational families, diversity in family forms, cultural philosophies of family, mixed parentage, and process of acculturation” (21). In their discussion about the process of acculturation, the authors refer to a study comparing Japanese and the Argentinean mothers who have migrate to the U.S. It is found that the Japanese mothers maintain more traditional cultural values when relocating to the U.S. whereas the Argentinean mothers try to acculturate to the U.S. culture. The study concludes that the European migrant mothers are more successful in acculturating the American than those Asian migrant mothers.

Over the past 40 years, parenting style has become one of the most robust approaches used in development psychology to study how parents are the source of the development of children’s socialization. One of the best-known theories of parenting style was developed by Diana Baumrind. In her research, she discusses four parenting styles: authoritative parenting, authoritarian parenting, permissive parenting, and neglectful parenting. Parenting style is shaped by the parent’s development history, education, and personality; the child’s behavior; and the immediate and broader context of the parent’s life. In addition, parents in different cultures, from different social classes, and from different ethnic groups rear their children differently. In any event, the children’s behavior and psychological development are linked to the parenting style within which they are raised.

2.2. Chinese Mothering

Whereas Baumrind’s theory regards Chinese parenting style as the authoritarian style which means that parents expect absolute obedience from their children without questioning and rely on physical punishment to shape their children’s behavior, Ruth K. Chao’s study (1994) proves her argument against Baumrind theory by stating that Chinese parenting style actually means guidance nurturing. An expert in the multicultural family and adolescent study, Chao has supported her argument with a great number of quantitative studies on Chinese immigrant parents and child development in the United States (1994, 1995, 2000, 2001, and 2002). In 1994, Chao conducted a quantitative research to offer the conceptualizations for the Chinese parenting style by questioning fifty immigrant Chinese mothers and fifty European-American mothers of preschool-age children about parental control and authoritative-authoritarian parenting style. It is found that besides being authoritarian, Chinese immigrant mothers tend to be more highly involved with their children’s lives than those European-American mothers. As Chao indicates, a Chinese mother becomes “the sole or central caretaker of the child” which is “physically close to the mother by sleeping with the mother” (1117). The result of the study has supported Chao’s argument that Baumrind’s conceptualizations are too specific as they discussed only the mothers in European-American culture.

In order to make her conceptualization of the Chinese parenting style trustworthy, Chao (2000) conducted another research titled, “Parenting of Immigrant Chinese and European American Mothers: Relations between Parenting Styles, Socialization Goals, and Parental Practices,” to study the differences between the parenting style of immigrant Chinese and European American mothers. The study examines the differences in the effects of mothering and mother-adolescent relationships on the school performance. Chao remarks that the immigrant Chinese mothers give more approval to the use of authoritarian parenting style with their children, purposefully endorse the socialization goals of filial piety, and are resolutely involved in their children’s lives more than those European Americans. The result of these mothering beliefs shows that “the first generation Chinese youth more consistently differs from European Americans in the effects of authoritative parenting and closeness than do second-generation Chinese youth” (Chao, 2000: 1842), whereas the second-generation Chinese adolescents tend to be similar to the European-American adolescents.

Viewed from the feminist perspectives, motherhood is a social construction that is imposed on women by idealizing their reproduction and childcare functional roles through patriarchal domination within the family and in the society. To be a good mother, a woman is expected to be selfless and should always act to fulfill the needs of her children. Recent studies on motherhood have uncovered the strengths and self-development of women in constructing their roles as mother within precise social, cultural and economic contexts. In her study entitled “Mothering Modes: Analyzing Mother Roles in Novels by Twentieth Century United States Women Writers,” Preselfannie W. McDaniels (2004) conducts a comparative study of eight Asian American literary works by women writers under the multifunction of mothering themes such as mothering as dilemma, mothering as difficulty, mothering understood, and mothering as transition. It is found that daughters gain more understanding about mothering and their mothers’ past by means of reading and listening to the mothers’ stories. In McDaniels’s view, no matter how hard the problem between mother and daughter was, almost all daughters were able to obtain a certain understanding of their mothers’ rearing of her children.

Furthermore, culture should be taken into consideration when discussing how to mother. Mothering is the primary method for socializing children. Culture is a critical force in this socialization process. Cultural values shape socialization goals to influence parenting styles and practices, which relate to the children outcome. Chao’s study (1995) demonstrates these relationships by comparing the cultural values and parenting practices of mothers from the European American and Chinese immigrant backgrounds. Chinese immigrant mothers view that a good mother must accomplish the following principles: (1) expressing love and sacrifice to the child , (2) valuing the child’s education, (3) training the child to make decisions based on filial piety, (4) educating the child to respect and love others, (5) fostering the child’s good personality, ability to get along with others, and adaptability to the child, (6) teaching the child by instilling good moral character, (7) instructing the child to be independent or self-reliant, and (8) directing the child to maintain Chinese culture. Meanwhile, the European American mothers, who are descendants of the European immigrants to the U.S., believe that they are influenced by American psychology in two ways. Firstly, they believe that mother has to provide an environment for child that directly supports the child’s developing needs. Secondly, the European American mothers also believe that they often “play the role of psychotherapist in dealing with their children conflicts” (347). From Chao’s observation, it is found that European American mothers insist on their children’s having “the ‘self-actualization’ – striving to live up to one’s ‘full potential’” (349). On the other hand, Chao asserts that Chinese immigrant mothers’ child rearing beliefs expect their children to maintain the relation with others. Chinese American children are expected to participate in their parents’ social gatherings. They cannot ignore the relationships of the family but rather learn how to get along with those people. Chao (1995) concludes that the Chinese American children are raised to be concerned for harmonious relations.

2.3. Previous Studies on Amy Tan’s The Bonesetter’s Daughter

Many researchers and scholars have discussed Tan’s The Bonesetter’s Daughter in various topics, such as the paraxis (a writing technique), representation of Orientals, the footbinding tradition, and the feminist spirituality.

There are four interesting studies focusing on Amy Tan’s The Bonesetter’s Daughter (Huang, 2004; Hall, 2006; Pu, 2006; Cassel, 2007). The first study focuses on the writing technique called praxis.  Rebecca Hall’s research “The Fantastic and Related Subgenres in Three Contemporary Novels: the Uncanny in Louise Erdrich’s Love Medicine, the Fantastic in Amy Tan’s The Bonesetter’s Daughter, and the Marvelous in Cynthia Ozick’s The Puttermesser Papers” (2006) explores three different novels and demonstrates that each novel represents a different aspect of the fantastic by manifesting a different subgenre. While a variety of definitions of the term paraxial have been defined, Hall’s paper uses the definition suggested by Rosemary Jackson (1981) who sees it as “a location where image and object seems to coexist, but nothing is really there” (qtd. in Hall 2006, 61). Hall concludes that without the paraxis techniques the three novels would not have ended convincingly.

However, many critics admit that Amy Tan’s works fail to launch the subjectivity of male dominance culture of China. In a critical analysis on The Bonesetter’s Daughter titled “Judging a Book By/Buy Its Cover: (Re) Producing or (Re) Presenting the Orient in Amy Tan’s The Bonesetter’s Daughter,” Bo-Yuan Huang (2004) focuses on the reproduction of Orientalism, claiming that Amy Tan’s works are the factors that condone Orientalism among worldwide readers because the covers of Tan’s novels always featured such exotic images as Chinese women, oriental flowers, and oriental dragon as a means to attract readers.  This reproduction of oriental could create the changes in the process of literature’s marketing, making the cultural studies aspect of Asian American literature more important than the traditional aspect of Asian American literature of textual analysis or identity politics. However, Huang claims that the main weakness of the study is the failure to address how the reproduction of Oriental in The Bonesetter’s Daughter emphasizes the idea of “the Otherness.” Within 71 pages, the study only touches upon the marketing process superficially, and ignores the textual analysis which Huang promises to explore in the introducing part.

Another study, Susie Lan Cassel’s “The Binding Altered not only my Feet but my Whole Character: Foot Binding and First-World Feminism in Chinese American Literature” (2007), comments on the practice of foot binding in The Bonesetter’s Daughter. According to Cassel, Chinese women in traditional Chinese culture have to bind their feet in order to be accepted as a perfect obedient wife and daughter. The practice transforms not only the shapes of their feet but also their mind. They are made to believe that they are “perfect.” Besides, foot binding implies the eroticization of women’s bound feet. As Cassel remarks, Chinese men are erotically interested in foot binding because the foot binding process requires the long term of preparation and sacrifice of women for men’s sake. In the eyes of Chinese men, the Chinese women with twisted bound feet are as sexy as the women with big breasts in the eyes of the Western men. Moreover, she also verifies that, in Chinese culture, the fetishism of bound foot should be hidden and should not be spoken out in public.

In feminist literary criticism, women can transform the ancestral spirituals to draw strength from ancestral stories, which give them the power to cope with oppression from external factors. Xiumei Pu’s study (2006) “Spirituality: A Feminist Reading of Amy Tan’s The Bonesetter’s Daughter” investigates the feminist spirituality according to Alice Walker’s theme of the triple spiritual connections, namely the spirit between an individual and his or her spirit, the spirit between an individual and her or his personal and familiar past, and the spirit between an individual and the larger environment. It is found that the three characters in The Bonesetter’s Daughter, who are the Chinese American daughter, her Chinese immigrant mother, and her Chinese grandmother, are physically and mentally affected by the haunting spirits of the ancestors. The ancestral spirits, in Pu’s words, become “the inner strength for Chinese American daughter to deal with the dilemma of being both Chinese and American” (48). As a result, the spiritual guidance leads each woman to behave and think both similarly and differently according to their social and cultural background.

2.4. Previous Studies on Amy Tan’s Other Novels

In recent years, Amy Tan’s works had been criticized through wide-ranging studies (Hsiao, 2000; Sun, 2005; Wong, 2007; Wung, 2008). Tan’s novels such as The Joy Luck Club, The Hundred Secret Senses, The Kitchen’s God Wife, are analyzed by focusing in different topics, for example, the portrayal of food imaginary, the cultural conflict between mothers and daughters, the Chinese Orientalization, the matrilineal narrative of women suffering, and the portrayal of sexual politics.

The culinary arts of Chinese and American constructed from the different tastes of each culture bring about the mother and daughter conflict as portrayed in Amy Tan’s novels. The first article which is titled Food Imaginary in Amy Tan’s The Joy Luck Club and done by Pi-Li Hsiao (2000), has investigated about portrayal of food imaginary. Hsiao has divided her article into three parts; the first part involves the food references that enhance the characters’ portrayal, the second part deals with the power relation between men and women as well as mother and daughter that are symbolized through the cooking process, and the third part reveals the Chinese culture in the Chinese American daughter’s eyes that are portrayed through the treatment of Chinese cookery. The significant point of Hsiao’s study is the last part, which also indicates the daughter’s ambiguous cultural identity. The study reveals that the different cultures in which mother and daughter have been raised make their opinion diverged, especially in the meal time. Hsiao advocates that the conflict in different tastes of Chinese mother and Chinese American daughter can be solved by negotiating and appreciating the combination of two cultures.

The cultural conflict between Chinese immigrant mothers and their Chinese American daughters is another most popular theme of Amy Tan’s novels. Miu Sim Malindy Wong’s study (2007), entitled “Chinese American Mothers and Daughters: the Novels of Amy Tan,” scrutinizes the issue of cultural conflict between Chinese immigrant mothers and their Chinese American daughter as represented in Amy tan’s The Joy Luck Club and The Kitchen God’s Wife. Another purpose of this thesis is that Wong wants to prove the existence of racial prejudice in the today’s U.S., which confuses the Americanized daughters about their true identity. As they are living together, the mother tries to secure the daughter’s position in new culture by getting the best things for her daughter. Unfortunately, the daughter is grown up believing that being American gives them a superior position in the society so she throws away her Chinese identity. By listening to her mother’s family stories, the Chinese American daughter learns to recreate new bicultural identity in order to find a balance in her hyphenated life in the U.S.

Amy Tan’s works usually becomes the target of critics in terms of the representation and reproduction of Orientalism. Amy Tan’s The Hundred Secret Senses is rarely researched in Chinese American literature study. In her research entitled, “Amy Tan’s The Hundred Secret Senses as a Showcase of Chinese Orientalization,” San-yi Wung (2007) discusses “the formation of Self . . . through the formation of the Other.” Furthermore, Wung mentions that the way Olivia, the protagonist, resists her half-sister and China is similar to the way the Westerners do to the Orient. In addition, the resistance of the protagonist occurs because she is shaped by the mainstream white patriarchal society. In accomplishing her American identity, she has to throw away her own cultural heritage and her Chinese characters. Wung’s study gives the straightforward conclusion that Amy Tan also considers the Chineseness as the mysterious “Other,” according to what she has written in the book. Wung believes that Amy Tan prefers to write about imagined China than the factioned one because the mysterious and horrifying images of her imagined China makes more sense to the Orientalist readers.

In 2005, Chia-Chun Sun’s study examines the matrilineal narrative of women suffering and spiritual growth in two novels by Cristina Garcia’s Dreaming in Cuban and Amy Tan’s The Joy Luck Club. Sun postulates that the life stories about the overcoming difficulties in the past function as “a way of fashioning identity and the response of the audience determine both the success of the story and the identity of the story tellers” (26). Sun discusses the storytelling functions in three parts. First she looks into the creation of idealized self-images and justifies the images of the protagonists of two novels, and then she inspects the emotional problems caused by the traumatic experiences of women. After that she studies the protagonists’ attitude towards the past suffering and how it shapes their lives. The result of the study reveals that finding solution for the conflicts between mothers and daughters allow the women to think more openly and positively and understand about their suffering past formulating them to be troublesome in the present time.

The oppression experienced by Chinese American women, particularly sexual harassment, is another important theme many scholars study. For example, Jianhui Wang (2007) reports in her study that these authors reproduce their eagerness for freedom in sexual oppression of the patriarchy from both American and Chinese cultures by writing from the Chinese American women’s voice resilience. Wang uses gender and race theories as her theoretical frameworks and make use of Edward W. Said’s concept of Orientalism to explore the issues of racial stereotypes of Chinese immigrants and their struggle against racial domination. Wang comments that the creation of binary oppositions by judging the gender, race, or class should be avoided so that people can become the same true level and there would be no more enemies.

Copyright© Chiang Mai University, September 21st, 2009

THEORETICAL FRAMEWORK

As mentioned in Chapter 2 Ruth K. Chao, who is an associate professor of Psychology at University of California, conducted a number of studies emphasizing on the paradigms used to create the understanding of Chinese immigrant mothering in the U.S. In her studies, Chao (1995) interviewed mothers from two cultures: the Chinese immigrant mothers and the European American mothers in order to illustrate the differences in the meaning of mothering in these two cultures. Chao’s purpose in conducting the study is to prove that each cultural mothering notably affects children’s behavior in particular circumstances. Chao’s survey (1995) specifically emphasizes the mothering of Chinese mothers who immigrated to the U.S. as adults and the mothering of European American mothers of at least the third generation of European immigrants in the U.S.

3.1 The Chinese Immigrant Mothering

This chapter discusses the reconceptualization of Chao’s traditional Chinese mothering theory by mainly focusing on the eight principles in Chao’s study (1995). According to Chao’s traditional Chinese mothering theory, Chinese immigrant mothers believe that a good mother must accomplish the following principles: (1) expressing love and sacrifice to the child, (2) valuing the child’s education, (3) training the child to make decisions based on filial piety, (4) educating the child to respect and love others, (5) fostering the child’s good personality, ability to get along with others and adaptability to the child, (6) teaching the child by instilling good moral character, (7) instructing the child to be independent or self-reliant, and (8) directing the child to maintain Chinese culture.

3.1.1 Expressing Love and Sacrifice to the Child

Chao’s studies suggest that in traditional Chinese mothering, the relationship between mother and the child is the key for success in being a good mother. Hence, a Chinese mother often nurtures her child with love from the very young age expecting that years later she would be able to depend on her child for a living when she becomes older. According to Chao (1994), the term “to govern,” or “guan” in Chinese, connotes the positive aspect as it means “to love” as well as “to care for” (1112). Thus, the traditional Chinese mothering aspect of loving the child also means that the mother should take a good care of her child, love and make sacrifices for her child, and control her child’s life just as a boss controls a firm. Chao’s study (1995) also reveals that the process of the principle of loving the child starts in the child’s early years and continues into adulthood. Chao (1995) has found that to build a strong bond between mother and daughter, a Chinese mother believes in the importance of providing the extensive support in any situation for her child, for example, being available to respond to every of her child’s need, finding solution for her child’s problems and guiding her child into the right track.

Furthermore, making a child aware of the mother’s sacrifice, which is the most important principles in the Chinese mothering, in Chao’s (1995) perspective, establishes the co-dependent relationship between the mother and her child. Chao (1995) affirms that Chinese mother classifies herself as caretaker who should devote and sacrifice herself for her child as much as possible. By doing so, the Chinese mother hopes that the child perceives the mother’s devotion as sacrifice, which serves as a symbol of the mother’s love. In other words, this traditional Chinese mothering principle of emphasizing love and having a harmonious relationship with the child can be looked at as a supportive, highly involved, and physically close mother-child relationship.

3.1.2 Valuing the Child’s Education

In traditional Chinese mothering, the educational achievement of Chinese children is a goal of creating responsible members in society. The process of being a good mother in traditional Chinese mothering is not solely measured by the degree of mother’s love and sacrifice but also by the degree of the mother’s ability to support the child in educational achievement. In Chao’s study (1995), it is obvious that Chinese mother has very high expectations for her child’s education, for she believes that her child’s educational success will bring her child good fortune in her/his career path. Chao (1995) also admits that most Chinese immigrant mothers perceive the children’s academic achievements as the family’s honour and pride. 69 percent of Chinese immigrant mothers in Chao’s study (1995) believed that education for their children was essential in the U.S. (342). This is because they knew well that as immigrant mothers having little education, they had to struggle a lot. Hence, these Chinese immigrant mothers think that it is their priority to give extensive support and to select the best schools for their children to facilitate maximum academic performance.

The traditional Chinese mothering, which values the importance of the child education as the mother’s first priority, also reflects the mother’s efficiency in managing her child’s life. Chao’s study (1995) reveals that Chinese immigrant mothers, who become aware of their inabilities to provide direct help for their children’s education, consequently decide to support their children’s academic performance by assigning more homework from additional exercise books, providing a good environment for self-study, enrolling them in extra classes, and scheduling their off-school time. Although the Chinese mother s’ involvement in the children’s academic achievement is apparently done, the expectation of having their children achieve the highest degree in education and those extra academic skills taught by Chinese mothers create more stress to Chinese descendants. Chinese immigrant mothers believe that their awareness of the value of their children’s education will ultimately enable their children to become successful members of the society.

3.1.3 Training the Child to Make Decisions Based on Filial Piety

In traditional Chinese mothering, Chinese descendants are trained to obey their parents while making decisions. According to Chao (1995), this traditional Chinese mothering principle of parental obedience is derived from the Chinese concept of filial piety or the “unquestioned obedience, honour and respect of the child to the parents” (343). Chao (1995) asserts that for most Chinese, parental demand for children’s obedience and parental strictness represent parental concern, caring and involvement. This principle is influenced by the Confucian belief, which promotes the children’s harmonious relationship with their parents and emphasizes the hierarchical relationship of the members within a family. Chao (1994) validates in her study about the filial piety among Chinese American children that the younger members of the family are required to obey and honor the senior members. In response of junior obedience the senior is also required to “responsibly and justly govern, teach and discipline” the junior (1113). Therefore, Chinese descendants are supposed to pay respect to not only their parents but also any senior in the family, namely grandparents, aunts, and uncles. Hence, whatever the Chinese descendants do, they need their parents’ approval of their deeds. Consequently, the Chinese descendants still seek for their parents’ approval, advice and guidance even when they become adults themselves. At the same time, Chinese parents also continue to give detailed suggestions and recommendations to their children.

Chinese children are expected to obey not only the adults in the family but also the teachers. This obedience is believed to enhance the children to do well in school. Chao (2001) clarifies that this practice enables the previous principle “importance of education” to accomplish, because the children respect their parents, therefore they are eager to exceed the academic achievement. As Chao advocates, the educational achievement is motivated by family obligation. The Chinese children are trained not to lose the face of the family by being unsuccessful in the education. It is clear that the Chinese children are shouldering the burden duties of doing well for the family.

Chinese children are also expected to recognize and accomplish the parents’ wishes. Chao (1995) concedes that it is the “individual perseveres to fulfill the expectations of the others” (343). In other words, the children are directed to put forward the parents’ wishes before their own desire even if they have to restrain their feelings and suffer from them. This is another family obligation of the Chinese children, who are shaped by the concepts of filial piety by not letting the parents be disappointed. To sum up, to satisfy all the elders in the family, the Chinese children are expected to be able to make the best decisions in regarding the elders’ concerns.

3.1.4 Educating the Child to Respect and Love Others

Besides paying respect to the elders in the family, traditional Chinese mothering also emphasizes teaching respect for others, which focuses on the child’s respecting others in the kin group. According to Chao (1995), the traditional Chinese mothering has a purpose to teach Chinese descendants the “humanistic ideal” of how to love others not just only to know them (344). Chao advocates that love for others in Chinese immigrant mothering, which is influenced by traditional Chinese mothering, is expressed through anticipating and meeting the others’ needs.

Furthermore, her study shows that this mothering principle also seeks for Chinese descendants’ kindness to others. For Chinese mothers, the kindness means that their children should be able to share anything with others and not be jealous in desiring others’ possessions. Chao’s study (1995) reveals that Chinese children are taught to be polite to others even if they have to pretend or suffer from being polite. Nevertheless, Chao (1995) remarks that politeness is a factor, which causes Chinese children to misunderstand that they are expected to be humble (348).

3.1.5 Fostering the Child’s Good Personality, Ability to Get Along with Others and Adaptability to the Child

To succeed in this principle, Chinese children should have good personality and be able to get along with others in order to create more connections with others. Chao’s study (1995) observes that Chinese mothers are concerned about their children’s ability to adjust themselves into the community (344). Chao’s study (1995) reports that Chinese descendents are expected to attach to their mothers in joining any community activities or to go to places where their mothers’ kin group can be found. While bringing their children along to the social gatherings, the Chinese immigrant mothers expect to create communal connections between the children and others (344). Chao (1995) also contends that this principle of adaptability compels the Chinese children to have harmonious interactions and relations with others. Due to the fact that traditional Chinese mothering emphasizes the harmonious relationship with the others, the Chinese descendants are supposed to be good at making a lot of friends.

3.1.6 Teaching the Child by Instilling Good Moral Character

Aside from having a good personality for getting along with others, as Chao (1995) asserts, Chinese descendants are strictly taught by Chinese mothers to have good judgment, to be honest, and to be a good person. Making good judgment, the Chinese children are meant to be able to judge what is right and what is wrong, for example, they have to avoid bad friends, and to avoid immoral behavior. The bad friends in the eyes of Chinese immigrant mother are those friends that are drug addicts, liars, or abuser (Chao, 1995: 344). This instruction in traditional Chinese mothering intends to create harmonious relationship among individuals as members of the larger society. As appeared in Chao’s study (1995), Chinese mothers believe that the smooth relationship between their children and the members of the society would somehow bring a good fortune to their children and give them the opportunity to assimilate into a particular society.

3.1.7 Instructing the Child to Be Independent or Self-Reliant

Traditional Chinese mothering encourages the Chinese descendants to be independent or self-reliant in order to be able to survive on their own. Chinese mothers consider that the ability of being more active and independent is significant for Chinese children, because they acknowledge their inability to teach their children about everything in the world (Chao, 1995: 345). In a study done by Chao (1995), the Chinese mothers value various kinds of children’s skills such as grooming, keeping house, and learning. Consequently, Chinese children are supposed to learn from their experiences, yet they are still under supervision of their parents, as a result of filial piety as well. However, Chao (1995) highlights that the Chinese children cannot freely go out and “break away” from the rules because they have to be concerned about parental obedience and being good moral character (345). Furthermore, any behavior, on the children’s part, that is regarded as immoral is unacceptable. The traditional Chinese mothering aims to create the children’s better character, so they can be good members of the society when they grow up.

Furthermore, Chao (1996) remarks that teaching a child to be self-reliant can be a result from the fact that the traditional Chinese mothering values the child’s education. Since the Chinese mothers cannot provide their children with the knowledge in high academic skills, they decide to only give them material needs and provide them with good environment and let the children bring the good fortune to themselves by means of diligent self-studying. While Western thought relies on the independence or self-reliance, the Chinese belief is based on the interdependence of family members. According to Chao’s study (1995), the European American mothers will stop guiding their children when their children become adults. On the contrary, the Chinese immigrant mothers always perceive their children as innocent no matter how mature the children become. Chao (1995) also remarks that the Chinese immigrant mothers always control their children’s lives even after their marriages, because the Chinese immigrant mothers think that they are the only mature women in the family, who have full authority to do so. In conclusion, the Chinese mothering emphasizes interdependence while Western mothering highlights the independence of an individual.

3.1.8 Directing the Child to Maintain Chinese Culture

The ulterior goal of maintaining Chinese culture among Chinese descendants is to acknowledge the importance of their cultural roots and to admit the differences of Chinese culture and American culture. Additionally, Chao’s study (1995) validates that Chinese children must learn to maintain the Chinese culture by accompanying their mothers in the Chinese community and actively participate in social engagements. Surrounded by the Chinese people, Chinese children born in the U.S. are stimulated to learn and speak Chinese fluently to their mothers, and, if possible, they are forced to study in Chinese schools where Chinese culture is a part of the curriculum.

The reverence for tradition is also included in the purpose of this principle. As Chao (1995) notes, Chinese mothers also emphasize the ancestral worship as well as traditional worship by teaching their children about “Chinese ways” (346). The Chinese mothers admitted in Chao’s survey (1995) that they had disquieted about losing the Chinese identity; therefore, they encouraged their children to maintain Chinese culture. By doing so, the Chinese children are expected to acknowledge the value of the traditional Chinese mothering along with holding up their Chinese identity.

3.2 The European American Mothering

Since this research aims to investigate the effects of the dislocation of traditional Chinese mothering on the mother-daughter relationship, it is worth citing Chao’s comparison of the Chinese mothering and the European American mothering. It is hoped that the study will shade light on the analysis of the Chinese immigrants’ daughters in Tan’s novel. Besides Chinese immigrant mothering principles, Chao’s study (1995) also demonstrates Chao’s survey (1995) indicate that unlike Chinese immigrant mothering principles, the European American mothering principles believe that a good mother must accomplish nine principles: (1) providing consistency, unconditional love for the child and making the child feel safe, (2) building the child’s self-esteem or self-confidence, (3) creating an environment for the child’s learning and exploring, (4) instilling the child to respect others and teaching the child the value of money and work, (5) getting in touch with the child’s feelings, labeling and articulating them to others, (6) emphasizing the child to be independence and individualism, (7) providing a “child-centered” environment and a developmental appreciation of the child, (8) training the child to acknowledge the importance of family and community, (9) having fun with the child and making the child’s life enjoyable.

3.2.1 Providing Consistency, Unconditional Love for the Child and Making the Child Feel Safe

Chao’s study (1995) asserts that the European American mothers have the primary goal in mothering their children in order to provide consistency, unconditional love for them to make them feel safe. Most mothers believe that a structured consistency in childrearing is the essence of child-centered approach. The European American mothers expect that their children would be able to search for “[their] own interests and achievements, reflecting an independent view of self” (336). In order to provide consistency, some European American mothers mention in Chao’s study (1995) that they must be full-time caretakers to enable them to provide their children with structured schedule for eating, napping and bedtime, and they have to make the children feel loved by listening to them and understanding them. Moreover, at least one of the European American mothers affirms that they have to provide their children with “a loving and secure environment” and to let the children know that they are indispensible to the mothers’ lives (335). Unlike the Chinese immigrant mothers, who express the mother’s love and sacrifice to their children to foster close relationship with them, the European American mothers provide their children with the love and support in order to create self-esteem among them so that at one point the children do not require the mother’s support anymore. This kind of European American mothering is the first step in building the children’s self-esteem, which will be discussed in details below.

3.2.2 Building the Child’s Self-esteem or Self-confidence

This European American mothering principle is extremely different from the Chinese immigrant mothering principle. According to Chao’s study (1995), only 8 percent of the Chinese immigrant mothers refer to this. In contrast, 64 percent of the European American mothers mention this (336). As a result of Chao’s study (1995), European American mothers admit that the idea of self-esteem has the same conception to the children’s “foundation for happiness” and “the full potential of life” (336). By means of the foundation for happiness, most of the European American mothers explain that it refers to the success in relationships, future family, education, and career (Chao, 1995). The European American children are supposed to have self-esteem in order to feel proud of themselves. So, they are taught that sometimes their own feelings are more important than others’ judgment.

To establish self-esteem in their children, European American mothers believe that they must be extremely nurturing and patient. Moreover, they also admit in Chao’s study (1995) that they believe that mothers’ encouragement and reinforcement in the children’s own ideas and thoughts reflects good mothering. Meanwhile, they believe that a good mother has to “avoid any negative comments or criticism” and to seek appraisal and support for their children’s emotions instead (336). The meaning of unconditional love among European American mothers is that they judge the child separately from their children’s behavior. In other words, they believe that the children are not completely bad, although their behavior under the circumstances can be considered as such.

3.2.3 Creating an Environment for the Child’s Learning and Exploring

This principle emphasizes that a good mother must provide her child with a stimulating environment with a lot of opportunities for the child’s exploring and learning. Chao (1995) points out that the educational support from the European American mothers differs from that of the Chinese immigrant mothers. Unlike the Chinese immigrant mothers, who only value the children’s educational achievements, the European American mothers motivate their children’s learning skills by providing an environment for exploring the general knowledge. According to Chao’s study (1995), the learning environment for the European American children can be provided through four methods namely, “promoting creativity and exploration, providing a stimulating home environment, exposing them to a variety of different experiences, and valuing reading” (337). This European American mothering principle is obviously influenced by the American cognitive and developmental psychology which are adhered to American mothers. This mothering principle is also referred to as the “facilitative model,” which represents a smaller frame of learning compared to the view of European American mothers, who need their children to explore general knowledge, even areas which are not directly related to academic performances (337).

3.2.4 Instilling the Child to Respect Others and Teaching the Child the Value of Money and Work

Chao (1995) remarks that the European American mothers do not know the actual meaning of values that they teach their children, because they do not have a traditional value to which to trace back. Hence, the European American mothers in the U.S. instill their children with the general concepts of having good values, for example, respecting others, being polite, being considerate to others’ feelings, not being materialistic, acknowledging the value of money, and being responsibility for some household chores. Teaching their children with these values, the European American mothers expect that their children are able to maintain good relationship with others.

3.2.5 Getting in Touch with the Child’s Feelings, Labeling and Articulating Them to Others

Teaching the children to express their feelings is another principle that differentiates the European American mothering from the Chinese immigrant mothering. Chao (1995) remarks that this practice is not mentioned by Chinese immigrant mothers in her survey. The purpose of getting in touch with the child’s feelings in European American mothering is to help the European American children to be able to identify their own needs. To teach the children to express their feelings, the European American mothers usually talk to their children when they are in conflicts with each other, in order that their children would be able to find out what the problem truly is and what their emotions are. Unlike the Chinese immigrant mothers, the European American mothers do not teach their children to understand the others’ feelings, or to listen to others’ needs. According to Chao’s study (1995), the European American children are taught to expect that “others should understand and listen to their individual needs” (339). To sum up, this principle implies that European American children are primarily concerned about their own emotions and feelings as European American individuals.

3.2.6 Emphasizing the Child to Be Independence and Individualism

Chao’s study (1995) advocates that European American mothering emphasizes that children should be independent not only in action but also in thought. This principle focuses on the children’s individuality and self-expression so that the children can experience freedom in appropriation with the children’s particular age. This enables children to explore the world and find their own answers by themselves.  While Chinese immigrant mothering emphasizes interdependence, European American mothering stresses independence of their children. The European American mothers give their children extreme freedom in exploring the world, whereas the Chinese immigrant mothers limit their children’s independence with the idea of filial piety. This means the Chinese descendants have to think about their parents’ needs in whatever they do.

3.2.7 Providing a “Child-centered” Environment and a Developmental Appreciation of the Child

Chao’s study (1995) reports that to supplement the children’s developmental process, the European American mothers have to provide a child-centered environment. In Chao’s study (1995), 24 percent of the European American mothers discusses that her house has furniture that is appropriate to their children’s age (340). Moreover, the European American children have important role in deciding where to visit during holidays. In doing so, they notice that their parents are supportive in any circumstances. The European American mothers provide the child-centered environment so that their children know they are appreciated and cared for. Gradually, the European American children will become stronger in indicating their own needs as they grow up.

3.2.8 Training the Child to Acknowledge the Importance of Family and Community

Another important finding in Chao’s study (1995) about the European American mothering is that they believe in training the children to acknowledge the importance of family and community. The European American mothers intend to teach their children to know their true identity through the connection to the family and community. Chao (1995) comments that the European American mothers’ attempt to facilitate connection between the children and the community because they sense and partially recognize “the isolation of the individual” in the American society (340). In addition, this principle only focuses on teaching the European American children to know their social positions and the relations to others. However, the connection of the European American children to the community is not greatly emphasized.

3.2.9 Having Fun with the Child and Making the Child’s Life Enjoyable

Making the child’s life enjoyable appears to be important only for the European American mothers, not for the Chinese immigrant mothers. The purpose of this principle is that the European American mothers want to provide a nice environment for the children’s learning and exploring. Letting the children have fun in whatever they do is an important element in European American child rearing. The European American mothers hope that their children will experience freedom and, therefore, can pursue their own happiness. Chao (1995) also points out that this principle is different from the first principle in European American mothering, which focuses on the children’s feeling good about themselves. That is, this principle aims to make the children feel good about their environment where the parents’ role is limited to ensure safety so the children can pursue their own happiness.

In conclusion, there are differences between the Chinese immigrant mothering principles and the European American principles. Unlike the Chinese immigrant mothering, which focuses on the child’s relationship with others, the European American mothering emphasizes individualism of the child. In building skills for the child’s success, the Chinese immigrant mothering only values the child’s educational achievement. On the contrary, the European American mothering not only creates an environment for the child’s learning but also building the child’s self-esteem. Individualism can also be seen in the European American mothering principle, which highlights the child’s valuing money and responsibility. Meanwhile, the Chinese immigrant mothering underlines the importance of the child’s showing obedience to his/her parent, and showing respect to others. In terms of teaching the child to be able to relate to others, the Chinese immigrant mothering stresses that the child should have good personality and be able to get along with others, whereas the European American mothering focuses on only the child’s expressing the true feelings to others. In other words, the Chinese descendants tend to do anything that pleases others’ feelings, whereas the European American descendants tend to express their feelings directly in order to solve any conflict. Besides, Chinese mothering and European American mothering teach the children differently. The Chinese immigrant mothering highlights that the children can be self-reliant, but they still have to act according to their parents’ wishes, whereas the European American mothering lays emphasis on the children’s individualism and child-centered environment. In building community-related identity, the Chinese immigrant mothers teach their children to maintain Chinese culture, whereas the European American mothers, who lack cultural background, tend to teach their children to relate themselves to the community and neighbors. Lastly, an additional principle that separates the European American mothering from Chinese mothering is the focus of making the child’s life fun.

In Chapter 4, which is about the analysis of Amy Tan’s The Bonesetter’s Daughter, the Chinese immigrant mothering principles will be used in analyzing LuLing’s mothering. The analysis will focus on whether LuLing mothers Ruth with these principles, and whether the dislocation of traditional Chinese mothering affects the mother-daughter relationship. The analysis in the next chapter will be based on the above theoretical framework, particularly when analyzing cultural conflicts between Chinese mother, LuLing, and her Chinese American daughter, Ruth, who are the characters in the novel. Moreover, the novel illustrates other conflicts resulting from those who are raised by European American mothering, such as, Ruth’s friends, neighbors, or co-workers. Therefore, these principles in Chinese immigrant mothering and those in European American mothering will help in illustrating the differences of two cultural mothering which leads to numbers of conflicts in the novel.

Copyright© Chiang Mai University, September 21st, 2009

ANALYSIS OF AMY TAN’S THE BONESETTER’S DAUGHTER

“In a society where mothers provide nearly exclusive careand certainly the most meaningful relationship to the infant,
the infant develops its sense of self mainly in relation to her.”

–Nancy Chodorow, The Reproduction of Mothering (78)

“A person should consider how things begin.
A particular beginning results in a particular end.”

–Precious Auntie, Amy Tan’s The Bonesetter’s Daughter (173)

Amy Tan’s The Bonesetter’s Daughter is an intricate story of conflicts in mother-daughter relationships of three women: Precious Auntie (Ruth’s grandmother), LuLing Liu Young (Ruth’s mother), and Ruth Luyi Young. Although they are raised by the same style of upbringing, which is the traditional Chinese mothering, LuLing and Ruth have different perceptions about mother-daughter relationship, mothering, and conflicts managements because of dissimilar upbringing environment. LuLing was raised in the China whereas Ruth is raised in the U.S. Hence, the major cause of the conflicts between LuLing and Ruth is LuLing’s dislocation of the traditional Chinese mothering. Since her American father, Edwin Young, died when she was two years old, Ruth has difficult time defining her identity because she learns only the Chinese culture from her mother. Ruth experiences a cultural shock for the first time when she enters school where she first learns about American culture. The dichotomy between LuLing and Ruth triggers melancholic conflicts and brings about unsettling identity of Ruth. Ruth has to grow up in an in-between position, for she both needs to be assimilated into the American society and has to maintain the Chinese culture in order to satisfy her Chinese mother. The novel illustrates how the Chinese American daughter’s acknowledgment of the past of her Chinese mother enables her to overcome the conflicts with her mother.

Based on Ruth K. Chao’s studies discussed in Chapter 3, the textual analysis of the novel in this chapter focuses mainly on the effects of the dislocation of traditional Chinese mothering on mother-daughter relationships. The analysis is based on the Chinese immigrant mothering principles cited in Chao’s study (1995). Conducted according to the timeline of the novel, the analysis extensively explores the relationship between the Chinese immigrant mother, LuLing, and the Chinese American daughter, Ruth. To fully understand how the dislocation of traditional Chinese mothering affects the relationship between LuLing and Ruth, LuLing’s upbringing and childhood background will be taken into consideration as well. That is, how Precious Auntie, LuLing’s mother, raises LuLing is worth studying, as it may influence LuLing’s mothering of Ruth.

4.1   Mother-Daughter Conflicts and Their Coping Strategies

“A mother is always the beginning. She is how things begin.”

–LuLing Liu Young, Amy Tan’s The Bonesetter’s Daughter (237)

As quoted above, LuLing says, “[A] mother is always the beginning” (237). She realizes this while she is thinking about the very first sound of a Peking Man must have been, “ma, the sound of a baby smacking its lips in search of her mother’s breast” (237). This statement is true as it supports the fact that LuLing’s mothering starts everything that is going to happen in Ruth’s life. In other words, Ruth’s identity formation begins with her mother’s traditional way of mothering. Besides, the conflicts between LuLing and Ruth also results from the way LuLing raises Ruth. That is, LuLing’s dislocation of traditional Chinese mothering initiates all her conflicts with her daughter Ruth. However, LuLing is also the first person who takes the very first step in mending her relationship with her daughter.  Thus, LuLing’s particular mothering results in Ruth’s having a particular life. This chapter examines the conflicts between LuLing and Ruth, their conflict coping strategies, and an analysis of the solutions to each conflict that Tan suggests in her novel.

According to Nancy Chodorow, “In a society where mothers provide nearly exclusive care and certainly the most meaningful relationship to the infant, the infant develops its sense of self mainly in relation to her” (78). This statement is true due to the fact that LuLing mothers Ruth with exclusive care and protective nurturing. Consequently, Ruth’s identity is formed according to her mother’s mothering. Hence, the Chinese mothers become the only source of information to which the Chinese American children attach. In Tan’s The Bonesetter’s Daughter, Ruth has to learn about Chinese culture while being raised by LuLing who adheres to the traditional Chinese mothering. During her childhood, Ruth does not recognize any other culture than the Chinese culture. LuLing always nurtures and orders Ruth what to do but rarely gives her reasons. Therefore, Ruth resentfully acts against her mother’s mothering. As a result, Ruth’s relationship with her mother turns out to be problematic for her; it causes them to inflict upon each other continuously. However, Ruth cannot completely stand against her mother because her mother is the only person with whom she has a connection.

Ruth has been growing up with a single Chinese immigrant mother LuLing. Consequently, she has no connection to the American society and does not receive any information and opportunities outside the house. When she reaches a school age, she has to encounter a cultural shock as she learns about another culture – - the American culture. A Chinese American daughter like Ruth merely learns the American culture from lessons at the school and from her American peers. She increasingly adopts the American culture and consciously or unconsciously resists her mother who adheres to the Chinese cultural beliefs and mothering. Hence, the conflict between Ruth and LuLing is unavoidable because of their mismatched values.

When a daughter chooses her American peer as a role model over her mother, it is inevitable that the mother sees her daughter’s behavior as a rejection of the mother. As a result, they end up with a conflict that causes distress to both of them. The six-year-old Ruth starts to acknowledge that she has different interest from her mother. When she learns about the American culture, which provides her with a more superior sense of self, she adopts the American culture and unconsciously rejects her Chinese immigrant mother. A good example of Chinese American daughter who tries to assimilate into the American society by resenting her Chinese immigrant mother, is rendered in Tan’s The Bonesetter’s Daughter in the scene in which Ruth is on the slide with her American friends in a playground. Ruth is trying to show off in front of her American peers by going down the slide with an unusual position. LuLing notices Ruth and is afraid that her daughter might be in danger, so she shouts in English with a Chinese accent, “No! Luyi, stop! What are you doing? You want to break your body in half?” (77). One of Ruth’s American peers then starts to shout, “Is that your mother?” (77). This question implies that Ruth’s friends have not met her mother before and they are surprised that Ruth’s mother is Chinese. Then another one mockingly asks, “What’s that gobbledy-gook-gook she’s saying?” (77). Ruth’s reaction is immediate; she shouts, “She [is] not my mother!”, and then she denies her mother’s existence, “I don’t know who she is!” (77). Ruth’s rejection of her mother results from her need to be accepted by her American friends. After her denial of her mother, Ruth fails off the slide. Then, she realizes that she needs her mother for some comfort and love, and in the meantime, LuLing knows that she has to be there for Ruth. This problem occurs because of Ruth’s misperception of her mother’s love. The scene clearly illustrates LuLing’s protective mothering. As Chao (1995) indicates, a Chinese immigrant mother believes she is the central caretaker of the Chinese American child (342). Therefore, LuLing believes that she has to give Ruth the guidance and warning to prove her love to her daughter. Nevertheless, LuLing can forgive her daughter, although just a few minutes earlier Ruth denied her.

A Chinese mother is also expected to raise her daughter with extensive care and to reform her daughter’s broken behavior. Ruth’s bone was broken, after Ruth had failed off the slide. Tan suggests that bone introduces a theme, which characterizes all the problematic relationship between LuLing and Ruth. The word “bone” in Chinese literally means the “character.” As GaoLing explains to Ruth about her mother’s Chinese family name “Gu”, she says, “. . . the way ‘bone’ is written can also stand for ‘character.’ That’s why we use that expression ‘It’s in your bones.’ It means, ‘That’s your character’” (398). Hence, the bonesetter in the title means putting a broken bone/character into a fixed position and holding it there, so that it will heal. In the novel, the ancestors of Ruth in China were called doctor “gu” in Chinese, which means “bone” in English. Thus, LuLing, the granddaughter of the bonesetter doctor is expected to bring her Chinese American daughter Ruth back on the right track, according to the traditional Chinese mothering. Obviously, LuLing still adheres to traditional Chinese mothering even though she has been living in the U.S. as an immigrant for many years. Raising Ruth with the traditional Chinese mothering, LuLing wishes to encourage Ruth to have a strong and proper character. In the playground scene mentioned earlier, when LuLing shouts, “No! Luyi, stop! What are you doing? You want to break your body in half?” (77), Tan has LuLing refer to not only Ruth’s physical bone but also Ruth’s character and identity which is about to break. The scene in which Ruth falls off the slide is indeed important as it conveys a symbolic meaning of LuLing’s perception about raising Ruth in the U.S. LuLing’s warning symbolically implies that Ruth’s attempt to be assimilated into American mainstream may cause Ruth to break her Chinese identity or her bone. Once Ruth does break her bone, LuLing feels that her daughter’s bone or identity needs to be fixed, and that it is her duty to fix it. Nonetheless, while LuLing is offering her daughter protective nurturing according to traditional Chinese mothering, Ruth rebels her mother because she starts to adopt the mainstream American culture. The way LuLing raises Ruth here affirms Chao’s findings in her study (1995) which indicates that a Chinese mother is supposed to do her best in order to provide the extensive support for her child including being available to respond to every of her child’s need and to guide her to the right track (342). But, to bring Ruth to the right track for LuLing is not easy. Ruth’s rebellion continues throughout her adolescence during which, she goes through the socialization process both in school and at home. Eventually, Ruth believes that she has to leave behind the Chinese culture in order to accomplish the assimilation.

Throughout her adolescence, Ruth learns that she has to choose to either please her mother or please her American friends. Ruth’s behavior during her adolescence is perceived by LuLing as bad behavior. Ruth, too, finds that LuLing’s treatment of her is inappropriate when Ruth finds out that her mother secretly inspects her dairy. Ruth is upset about this because her mother starts to order her to stay away from “bad” things or “bad” friends. For example, LuLing says to Ruth, “No more go beach after school”, or “No more see this Lisa girl” (157). Thereafter, when LuLing accuses Ruth of smoking, Ruth firmly claims her American identity:

“I’m an American,” Ruth shouted. “I have a right to privacy, to pursue my own happiness, not yours!”

“No right! All wrong!”

“Leave me alone!”

“Why I have daughter like you? Why I live? Why I don’t die long time ’go?” LuLing was huffing and snorting. Ruth thought she looked like a mad dog. “You want I die?”

Ruth was shaking but shrugged as nonchalantly as she could. “I really don’t care.” (158)

In this scene, Ruth is self-centered. She tries so hard to win the conflict by asserting her own needs and disregarding her mother’s needs. Having claimed her identity as an American, Ruth thinks she has privacy of her own. Chinese American daughter usually feels that she should have the right to draw a line keeping others from trespassing her private sphere. In Ruth’s eyes, LuLing’s sneaking is unacceptable. Meanwhile, LuLing tries to dominate her daughter by means of mothering her. In coping with the conflict with her daughter, LuLing is firm in her own belief that she owns the right to provide her daughter with the protective nurturing. Therefore, LuLing applies the suicide threat with Ruth hoping that it will consequently work well in the same way her mother (Precious Auntie) did to her. LuLing strongly believes that a Chinese mother is supposed to supervise every bit of her daughter’s life. Here, LuLing proves Chao’s study (2000) right that Chinese immigrant mothers tend to be more highly involved with their children’s lives than those European American mothers (246). Chao (1995) also postulates that a Chinese mother becomes “the sole or central caretaker of the child” (342). Therefore, Ruth’s reaction to write diary obstructs LuLing’s method of mothering to succeed and consequently cause LuLing’s mothering to be disorganized.

Like many teenagers’ mothers, LuLing does not want to acknowledge that her daughter Ruth needs to carve out a life of her own without traditional Chinese mothering’s influence. Therefore, LuLing feels that her adolescent daughter’s diary is an attempt to hide something from her and thereby causes her to be frustrated. She then tries to inspect Ruth’s diary. Raised by traditional Chinese mothering, LuLing believes that she, as a mother, has the complete right to know everything about her daughter. She says to Ruth, “[A] daughter should have no secret from a mother” (157). Back in China, LuLing learned that reading the mother’s written story was the best way to communicate with Precious Auntie as it helps to create a strong bond between Precious Auntie and herself. Hence, LuLing believes that knowing everything about her daughter’s livelihood is the best way to keep her daughter closer. Moreover, LuLing assumes that this is a way to show Ruth that she has the good mother who takes care of her every step in life. In LuLing’s eyes, Ruth used to be very obedient. After being exposed to American culture, Ruth turns away from her mother’s cultural heritage. So LuLing feels that she does not have any right to get close or know her daughter’s whereabouts anymore. The only thing that would allow her to do so is to activate her predomination over her daughter. Hence, she thinks that she has the right to read her daughter’s diary. According to Chao’s study (1995), Chinese immigrant mothers have to struggle raising their children and presume that they deserve to know their daughter’s story (347). Furthermore, McLanahan (1994) endorses Chao’s theory that the traumatic experiences of single mothers put more stress on them and weaken them while mothering their children (37). Hence, LuLing feels stressful and miserable whenever Ruth tries to block her out of her whereabouts and lifestyle.

Misunderstanding is another cause of the conflicts between a mother and a daughter. The ability of interpreting the other’s utterance can vary according to the culture and society in which one grows up. For the Chinese immigrant mother, every utterance and action has a connotation which needs interpretation. On the other hand, the Chinese American daughter does not know how to decode the connotation of her Chinese mother’s criticism because she does not grow up in China, where the nuance in the Chinese language is used in everyday life. As Wendy Ho (2000) indicates, “To understand this nuance language of embodied feelings is to develop a level of sensitivity and patience for the details in the developing patterns of love and intimacy that structure intricate relationships and identification” (19). In the novel, LuLing’s Chinese needs to be interpreted by Ruth. But, Ruth is incapable of understanding her mother’s love that is portrayed through her mother’s criticism.

According to traditional Chinese mothering, the Chinese mother has a role to show her love through comments in her daughter’s grooming. This idea brings about the conflict between mother and daughter in Tan’s The Bonesetter’s Daughter. Moving into a new, smaller house, eleven-year-old Ruth has to endure living in the same room as her mother, LuLing. The limited space in the house even allows LuLing more opportunity to complain on Ruth’s looks and behavior. One day while Ruth is watching TV, LuLing complains about Ruth’s hair getting too long, saying, “Hair [covers] your glasses like curtain, can’t see. You think this good-looking, I telling you not good-looking! You tune off TV, I cut hair for you. . . . Eh, you hear me. Tune off TV. . . .” (123). For Ruth, she assumes that LuLing does not want her to watch TV. So her mother starts to find another activity to prevent Ruth from being addicted to TV. Because Ruth hates her mother’s behavior, she then ignores her mother’s complaint and insists on watching TV. It is obvious that the conflict occurs because Ruth does not understand the true meaning of love expression in Chinese immigrant’s mothering. Ruth does not understand that she is the only intimate relative her mother has in this new society, America.

The misinterpretation between mother and daughter leads to misapprehension which creates communication gaps in their relationship. As Yuan Yuan (1997) advocates, for the Chinese American daughter, her Chinese mother’s teachings are “translated into a mode of discourse, a style of domineering, a tongue for control, and a gesture for having authority over the daughter’s life” (161). In fact, Ruth does not acknowledge that her mother’s criticism is an attempt to reconstruct Ruth’s identity. Consequently, the more LuLing criticizes or tries to control Ruth, the more Ruth attempts to resist her mother’s mothering. On the other hand, LuLing thinks that her role as Ruth’s caretaker is a goal for every Chinese mother who needs to be recognized as a good mother. Back in China, LuLing is taught by Precious Auntie that mother’s criticizing daughter is done for “[the daughter’s] own good” (158). When LuLing was young, she did not know that Precious Auntie, who was in fact her mother, showed the love to her through criticism. Once Precious Auntie criticized LuLing for not bringing the comb to the Peking’s trip, she then said through body language, “Didn’t take your comb? No one to remind you? Now you know why you need me. You have no brains! She jabbed the side of my head, and this made me irritable” (187).

Another thing that causes misunderstanding between LuLing and Ruth is the cultural difference between the mother LuLing and her Chinese American daughter Ruth. According to Chao (1995), maternal love also means that the mother should take care of every bit of daughter’s life (342). Therefore, LuLing expects her criticism about Ruth would be a proof of her love. Thus, she believes that the more she criticizes, the more love she feels towards her daughter. LuLing’s perception of her criticism is relevant to Chao’s findings. As Chao (2005) asserts, the discrepancy of the mother’s perception and the daughter’s ideal of parental warmth cause the cultural conflict among the Chinese immigrant mothers and the Chinese American daughters (517). Especially in Ruth’s case, her mother is the only one who nurtures her throughout her life. The similar cultural conflict in LuLing-Ruth relationship subsequently arises because LuLing tries to maintain the value of the traditional Chinese mothering whereas Ruth has adopted the American culture. Thus, Ruth becomes frustrated in the conflicts with her Chinese immigrant mother because of their mismatched cultural perceptions.

LuLing’s haunting memories about her dead mother affect her treatment of Ruth. Back in China, LuLing was taught that mother’s criticism was for the daughter’s own good. That is, it is proper to apply the traditional Chinese mothering while raising Ruth in the U.S. As for LuLing, she adheres to the Chinese ideology that mother who criticizes her children is considered as a good mother as she honestly tries to push her daughter to do better. According to Miu Sim Malingdy Wong’s study (2007) entitled “Chinese-American Mothers and Daughters: The Novels of Tan,” “[T]raditional Chinese parents would even criticize their own children out of love because they want them to do better and better” (18). Besides, LuLing even criticizes her daughter straightforwardly; her criticism needs not be polished, for she wants her daughter to have a better look. Meanwhile, Ruth perceives her mother’s criticism as negative. Therefore, the discrepancy of LuLing and Ruth’s perception leads them into a number of conflicts.

Another misunderstanding, which is caused by Ruth’s unspeakable problem on the subject of her troublesome relationship with her European American boyfriend, brings about another conflict with her mother. Ruth misinterprets the meaning of self-reliance in traditional Chinese mothering that it expects her to handle her own problem without consulting with her mother. Thus, Ruth cannot honestly express her own needs to her mother and she cannot consult her problem with her mother. Ruth’s behavior creates a gap between herself and her mother. Additionally, she cannot express her true feelings to others such as her friends, her co-workers, or even with her boyfriend, because she is aware of being different from them. While Ruth is so busy achieving her job and dealing with her step-daughter, she forgets to take good care of her mother. LuLing then assumes that her daughter values the job much more than the mother’s existence. When Ruth tells her mother that she does not have much free time to visit her, LuLing makes a sarcastic remark to Ruth saying, “So busy, so success” (44). LuLing’s words in this scene imply that she perceives Ruth’s behavior as ungrateful and that she wants to correct that. Then, LuLing tries to make Ruth feel guilty for not visiting her, as she says, “Not free . . .  because every minute must charge money. What I should pay you, five dollar, ten dollar, then you come see me” (44). LuLing’s sarcasm implies that she feels deeply hurt about not being the most important person in Ruth’s life. As Tan writes in her novel, “LuLing simply want[s] to be essential, as a mother should be” (344).  Moreover, LuLing also thinks that she is not as worthy as Ruth’s precious work. LuLing feels that she is neglected by Ruth, because she hopes Ruth will take care of her when Ruth is successful in her career. Thereafter, LuLing feels disappointed and cannot help blaming Ruth’s works that keeps her “[s]o busy” that Ruth cannot visit LuLing so often (44). LuLing’s sarcasm probably arises from the fact that she used to look down on her mother when she was young. Back in China, LuLing thought, “[T]he smarter I thought I had become, the more I was able to reason that Precious Auntie was only a servant, a woman who held no great position in our household, a person no one liked” (205). LuLing assumes that her daughter does not value her in the same way LuLing did not value her mother. LuLing is afraid that one day Ruth would forget to maintain the Chinese culture and would ignore her. As Chao (1995) remarks in her study, the Chinese immigrant mothering emphasizes that a good mother should value the importance of expressing love and sacrifice to the child (342). The true intention of love expression in Chinese immigrant mothering is to express it in a humble way. The expression of love not only tells the daughter about mother’s love, but also shows how much mother’s love for the daughter is.

Nonetheless, LuLing has never thought that her mothering has affected Ruth’s life in a negative way. Her endless mothering is done because of her love. If Ruth were a daughter to a European American mother, she might have been able to express her feelings to her mother more comfortably and able to explain why she has been so busy, and, that she truly loves her mother. Wodak and Schulz (1986) point out that the adolescent daughters, particularly those Chinese Americans, experience much tension from her mother’s controlling and when the adolescent daughter learns from school that she can rebel against her mother although she has to feel guilty for her troublesome behavior (127). Wodak and Schulz (1986) also add that such conflicts between mother and daughter will last long, until the mother stops controlling her daughter’s life (11). In this way, it is apparent that Ruth feels guilty as long as she lives with her mother because her mother would continuously dominate her.

Besides, Chinese immigrant mothering aims to teach the Chinese American children to have a good personality and ability to get along with others in order to avoid having conflict or confronting with trouble. After Ruth had accused Lance that he impregnates her, and she later found out it is misunderstood. Since then, Ruth has been avoiding Lance. Once Ruth walks across Lance’s house, he tries to call for her but Ruth attempts to walk away. In his attempt to settle down the problem with Ruth, he says, “Come on, you don’t have to do that. I wanted to talk so we could have an understanding. I just don’t want this to ever happen again. Okay?” (143). Lance, who is a European American, tries his best to settle down the problem whereas Ruth tries to run away from it. Here, it is clear that the principles of different cultural motherings affect the two children like Lance and Ruth differently. Wodak and Schulz (1986) posit that mother’s expectations can be exacerbated by guilt (48). Their study indicates that when a mother tries to get the child the best life, the more tension is put on the children’s minds (Wodak and Schulz 48). In other words, a mother puts all her effort in raising her child, so she expects the best in her child’s life. Therefore, any terrible result or experience of her child is unacceptable.

The novel also suggests that it is unacceptable for a Chinese mother to see her daughter’s ungratefulness. There is a scene in Tan’s novel, which portrays if a Chinese American adolescent girl turns to listen to her American friend rather than her Chinese mother, the conflict between them are unavoidable. For example, LuLing asks eleven-year-old Ruth to deal with neighbor’s dog trespass her lawn. Ruth refuses to be an interpreter for her mother in order to show her mother that she cannot stand her mother’s mothering anymore. Her refusal implies that she has been suffering from learning only the Chinese culture. She has never learned how to find a balance for her in-between position. Her mother’s dislocation of traditional Chinese mothering affects Ruth’s decision. She turns to take on her American friend’s suggestion. Ruth believes in her roommate’s suggestion that she should ignore her mother because the mother, in an American friend’s perception, is not paying the daughter’s education fee to make her a “punching bag” (53). The roommate says that the education expenses are the parents’ duty to pay but “that doesn’t give them the right to make [Ruth her mother’s] slave” (53). As a consequence, “Ruth confront[s] her mother: ‘If it bothers you so much, you take care of it’” (53). On the other hand, LuLing cannot accept her daughter’s negligence in her presence; she then says with regret, “You wish I dead? You wish no mother [tells] you what to do? Okay, maybe I die soon!” (53). This is what Ruth feels in the meantime:

And just like that, Ruth had been upended, flung about, was unable to keep her balance. LuLing’s threats to die were like earthquakes. Ruth knew that the potential was there, that beneath the surface, the temblors could occur at any time. And despite this knowledge, when they erupted she panicked and wanted to run away before the world fell down. (53)

In this context, Ruth starts to feel deserted from her mother because she has a new broader view towards the world, after she has learnt that she needs to be assimilated into the mainstream America and that it is inevitable for her to avoid her Chinese heritage. Her behavior has changed because her friend suggests that she ignore her mother’s need. Back in China, LuLing’s mother threatened to commit suicide. At that time, LuLing was told to speak for Precious Auntie but LuLing rejected to do so. LuLing later felt guilty for disobeying her mother because she believed it was the cause of her mother’s death. LuLing’s disobeying her mother at that time bring a great haunted tragedy since Precious Auntie committed suicide, for she cannot accept her daughter’s disobedience. Hence, LuLing presumes that this threat of committing suicide would have tortured Ruth if LuLing had actually died. In this sense, Precious Auntie had given LuLing a lesson about living as a motherless child.

LuLing expects that her extensive care would make Ruth notice her attempt in mothering Ruth to become a grateful daughter. LuLing’s mothering about filial piety is related to Chao’s findings. As Chao (1995) indicates, the Chinese immigrant mother is expected to train their children to make decisions based on filial piety (343). In traditional Chinese mothering, the children are expected to recognize and to accomplish their parents’ wishes. In other words, the children are directed to put forward the parents’ wishes before their own desire even if they have to restrain their feelings or even suffer from following the parents’ orders. Hence, it is disappointing for LuLing to see Ruth’s making decision based on her American roommate. Another study done by Chao (2006) also reveals that some Chinese immigrant mothers cannot speak English as fluently as their daughters do; therefore, their Chinese American daughters have to be the language interpreter for the mothers because they cannot deny their Chinese heritage (277). In Chao’s study (2006), which investigates the daughters role of being the “language broker,” it is found that the language brokering process “foster[s] a greater trust and respect between mothers and daughters” (274). Furthermore, Chao’s study (2006) also reveals that daughter’s interpreting for mother brings more understanding in mother-daughter relationship (286). Nonetheless, Ruth’s American friend is raised by an European American mother who gives the child the freedom to express himself/herself and put his/her own feelings before others. Indeed, this principle of the European American mothering differs from that of the traditional Chinese mothering, which captures the children in the parents’ life-time guidance. Hence, Ruth would not have encountered this conflict had she been a daughter of a European American mother.

In addition, the fracture of the family structure determines children psychological well-being. Schneider (2005) asserts that the children with single mothers tend to have more behavioral problems than those from intact families (19). Additionally, the frequencies of family conflict cause the children to become unable to find solution for their own problem. As Chodorow asserts in her book, once adolescence starts to have distinctive needs from her mother, she rejects her mother physical body as well as her mother’s psychological needs (84). Thus, when a daughter’s values and beliefs are influenced by her Western peers, and a mother still maintains the Chinese cultures, conflicts are often unavoidable. Besides, the Western thought relies on the independence or self-reliance, whereas the Chinese belief is concerned about the interdependence. Hence, as Chao (1995) admits, the European American mother would stop guiding her child when her child becomes adult (347). On the contrary, Chinese immigrant mother always perceives her child as a child no matter how mature she becomes.

Ruth has seldom valued her mother’s love and, she overlooks her mother’s sacrifice. When Ruth turns into 40 years old, she notices her mother’s illness (Dementia). Dementia is the illness, which causes LuLing to lose her memory about China. In a scene, Ruth is about to bring her mother to see the doctor. Ruth finds expired coupons from magazines her mother collecting for her. Then LuLing says proudly, “I win all for you” (64). At that time, Ruth is overwhelmed by her mother’s behavior: “Ruth felt a twinge in her chest” (64). Ruth feels that “[s]he want[s] to embrace her mother, shield her, and at the same time want[s] her mother to cradle her, to assure her that she [is] okay, that she ha[s] not had a stroke or worse” (64). As an adult, Ruth now understands why “her mother ha[s] always been, difficult, oppressive, and odd” (64). Suddenly, Ruth acknowledges her mother’s love as she knows that “[n]o one could have loved her more. Better perhaps, but not more” (64). As an adult, Ruth senses the strong feeling of love in her mother’s attempting to collect coupons for free things in order to support Ruth’s needs. Ruth now learns that her mother’s love is the best reward in her life. In the meantime, LuLing believes that she has to earn the money to support all of her daughter’s need. Ruth also realizes the sense of losing her connection to the Chinese identity, the Chinese culture and her mother’s traditional Chinese mothering. According to Yuan (1997), “Loss/lost functions as the central metaphor for mother’s recollection and the central code to decipher her existence” (159). Without a memory, LuLing becomes simply the “ghost” without a past in an alien territory (Yuan 159). The way Ruth wants to give the same nurture to her mother implies that she is afraid to lose her connection with her mother as well as her half Chinese identity. If LuLing truly had lost her memory, Ruth would have not had anyone to link her back to the China as a country and Chinese as a language.

Although LuLing is 82 years old, she still seeks for chances to get the best thing for her daughter. She thinks that the coupons she collects will be useful for Ruth someday. Furthermore, she feels proud that she can accomplish the mother’s role in terms of traditional Chinese mothering. According to Chao’s findings (1995), a good Chinese immigrant mother should be available to respond to every of child’s needs (342). LuLing probably realizes her daughter’s needs. Therefore, LuLing buys every magazine offering free coupons, but she does not notice that they are all expired. Meanwhile, Ruth feels sorry for her mother suffering from Dementia; she wants to hug her mother and gives her consolation in the same manner as her mother gave her when she was young. In traditional Chinese mothering, a mother gives comfort, love and sacrifice to her daughter wishing that someday her daughter would nurture her back whenever the mother is unwell or miserable. As Chao (1995) indicates, Chinese immigrant mothering highlights that the mother, in achieving the best mothering ability, has to show the daughter that mother’s love is the best thing in the world (342). The Chinese immigrant mother tries her best to express love expression through her treatment of children and her support (342). For example, a mother needs to be responsible for every aspect of her daughter’s needs, or helps her daughter solve problems, and be supportive for her daughter. In addition, Chao (1995) postulates that the Chinese immigrant mothers tend to be the endless nurturers; they believe that their children are innocent no matter how mature they become (342). Thus, LuLing still seeks for all the best things to serve her beloved daughter’s needs. Furthermore, Wodak and Schulz (1986) contend that mother’s expectations can be aggravated by guilt (48). When a mother sacrifice to get the child the best life, it is clear that the more stress are put on the children’s minds (48). Eventually, Ruth oblige to this guilt imposed by LuLing’s mothering. She has to inflict with her mother at first and later feels the guilt of doing so. Such behavior of Ruth can be seen in the scene when 40 year-old Ruth finds her diary she wrote when she was adolescent. The conflict between Ruth and LuLing happened since Ruth was 11 years old, at that time she wrote: “I hate her! She’s the worst mother a person could have. She doesn’t love me. She doesn’t listen to me. She doesn’t understand anything about me. All she does is pick on me, get mad, and make me feel worse” (159). Now she reads her words, and feels “shocked that she could write such horrible feelings” (159).

Another effect of the dislocation of traditional Chinese mothering on mother-daughter relationship is that Ruth learns from her mother to be humble, so she considers that she must render her own needs in order to satisfy or accomplish others’ needs. In her adulthood, Ruth receives a counterfeit necklace as a gift from LuLing who believes that “[i]f someone show-off give big” (104). While LuLing is giving the gift to Ruth, “[s]he [is] patting the back of her bun, trying to stuff pride back into her head” (104). Ruth learns from her mother’s behavior about emotional expression; especially love that “the less you showed, the more you meant” (104). Hence, Ruth is unable to express her feelings directly to her mother because she thinks her mother would perceive her love expression as valueless. According to Chao (1995), the Chinese immigrant mothers admit that they nurture their Chinese American children to maintain the Chinese culture, especially the frugality (346). Believing so, LuLing presumes she is supposed to offer only the best things for her daughter as she believes that doing. She also proves another humble sentence about her love for Ruth, “Anyway, this [is] not worth much,” to instruct Ruth that the best thing does not have to be the expensive thing (104). Here LuLing teaches Ruth, from then on, to value things from its quality not its price. Besides, the frugality is an Asian character trait which shows that the Asians value the closed connection and harmonious relationship unlike the Westerns who values money.  However, LuLing’s teaching about frugality affects Ruth as it makes Ruth’s life miserable because Ruth has to live in the materialistic world – - the American society. LuLing’s teaching has a good intention for her daughter but Ruth fails to acknowledge the necklace as a precious inheritance given by her mother. Ruth has a European American friend who buys expensive bed sheet every year. Believing in her mother’s mothering about frugality, Ruth spends her money concerning on its quality, anything that last long: the thing she bought does not have to be expensive just anything that is worth buying.

In addition, Chao (1995) remarks that the European mothers focus on making the child’s life enjoyable, but the Chinese immigrant mothers do not have this mothering principle (347). This discrepancy makes Ruth and Gideon, her European American friend, value things differently because of their mismatched ideologies about happiness. Eventually, Ruth understands her mother’s frugality and she applies this ideology which is unfortunately misunderstood by her American friend. According to Pan et al.’s (1994), the traditional Chinese cultural value emphasizes the personal “inner experiences of meaning and feelings,” which differs from the materialism in the American culture (24). Pan et al.’s book also affirms that the Chinese who adheres to the traditional Chinese cultural value, are proud of their frugality than the American. Thus, LuLing secretly shows her pride of her frugality while giving the small pearl necklace to her beloved daughter. In this sense, only Ruth can notice her mother’s reaction because she has been growing up with single mother LuLing and develop the sense of herself and her behavior in relation to her mother.

Besides frugality, the Chinese descendants are expected to give up their own needs and try to please other’s needs. It is very important for the Chinese descendants to satisfy her mother in order to show her filial duty. As mentioned in the previous paragraph, Ruth learns from her mother to render her own needs and tries to satisfy others, especially her beloved mother. Besides, Ruth is expected to be an obedient daughter in order to show respect to her mother. Therefore, it is difficult for Ruth to tell her mother the truth that the necklace is not made of real pearl. Knowing that the necklace is counterfeit, LuLing may feel terrible as if she were betrayed by her beloved daughter. LuLing gives Ruth a fake black pearl necklace. Ruth is ashamed because it is the same necklace she bought for LuLing’s birthday last year. Suffered from Dementia, LuLing gives the necklace back to Ruth with a belief that it is worth a lot. Having noticed her daughter’s odd behavior, LuLing asks, “Eh, what wrong?” (105). Ruth denies and reasons that she is “just a little tired” (105). LuLing does not believe in Ruth’s words, she then shifts to speak Chinese trying to squeeze the truth from Ruth, “I can see something is blocked inside and can’t come out” (105). Ruth is surprised to see her mother becoming “so perceptive” (105). Then, she distracts her mother from the counterfeit necklace by saying that she does not expect Art’s ex-wife to come to the dinner. With relief, LuLing says, “Ah! You see, I was right! I knew something was wrong. Mother always knows” (105). Here, Ruth has to make decision whether to tell her mother the truth about the necklace. After all, she knows that telling the truth may hurt her mother’s feelings. Hence, Ruth distracts her mother from the necklace to her relationship with Art. The reason why Ruth lies is that she is concerned about her mother’s feelings and that she has to make decision based on filial piety. According to Chao (1995), the Chinese descendants are supposed to be able to make decisions based on filial piety (343). Therefore, Ruth keeps telling lies to her mother throughout her life. However, Ruth and LuLing speak Chinese in order to create privacy in their conversation so that no one on the table would know Ruth’s feelings. LuLing unconsciously teaches her daughter to express herself but in a particular language – - the language that is known only by them. This behavior signifies not only that LuLing cares for Ruth’s feelings but also that their relationship is very intimate only when they speak Chinese.

In short, LuLing shifts to speak Chinese to her daughter because she believes that “you think differently, you feel differently” (66). LuLing’s behavior in speaking Chinese implies that she attempts to use the Chinese language as a device to make Ruth feel the same way she does. Chinese is a nuance language; therefore, LuLing’s speaking Chinese enables Ruth to easily interpret the underline meaning of the language. Consequently, LuLing intentionally teaches Ruth to be honest only when she speaks Chinese and educates Ruth to use the intimate connection to solve problem. As Pan and her co-researchers (1994) indicate, the traditional Chinese cultural values emphasize that the harmonious interpersonal relationship is precious (70). Eventually, the Chinese acknowledge the advantage of having intimate connections by using the connections to solve problems.

Not only LuLing adheres to the traditional Chinese mothering, but GaoLing whose belief based on the traditional Chinese mothering, affects Ruth’s life.  As an adult, Ruth becomes an ungrateful daughter in the eyes of GaoLing, LuLing’s sister. GaoLing also relies on Chinese immigrant mothering’s principle which emphasizes the mother’s role to foster a good relationship with the child in order to let the child, in return, be a caretaker for her (the mother). Without a good relationship, the daughter would not take care of her mother in return for a favor as a grateful daughter. Ruth has told her aunt, GaoLing, about the doctor’s diagnosis that LuLing suffers from the Dementia, an illness that causes patient to have memory disorder and personality change. GaoLing blames Ruth for not taking good care of LuLing, her elder sister. GaoLing also instructs Ruth to keep on talking Chinese with LuLing. Furthermore, she believes that Ruth should be attentively looking after her mother. GaoLing continues, “The problem is, today kids have no time anymore to see parents. Your mommy’s lonely, that’s all. She has no one to talk to in Chinese. Of course her mind is a little rusted. If you stop speaking, no oil for the squeaky wheel!” (120). As for Ruth, she believes in a doctor’s diagnosis that her mother is simply sick and suffers from Dementia. Meanwhile GaoLing disagrees with the doctor and thinks it is a daughter’s duty to take good care of the mother when she becomes elder and feel lonely.

GaoLing also adheres to the traditional Chinese mothering although she seems to have more westernized idea than LuLing. To GaoLing, Ruth holds responsible for not speaking Chinese to her mother, which consequently causes her mother to get Dementia. Although GaoLing has more westernized ideas than LuLing, traditional Chinese mothering also becomes habitual in GaoLing’s life that a good daughter must maintain a good relationship with her Chinese mother. GaoLing also agrees that the best companion in a daughter’s life is the mother. Being apart from LuLing, Ruth is blamed by GaoLing for not taking a good care of her mother. GaoLing deems that LuLing does not suffer from any disease, but a lonely feeling that most elders suffer from being left alone. Consider the difficulty of an old woman living on her own, let alone a Chinese immigrant mother living alone in a completely outlandish environment from where she grew up. It is evident that GaoLing is also affected by the dislocation of traditional Chinese mothering.

In addition, all Chinese women nurture their daughters hoping that their daughters will, in return, take care of them in the future. In Chao’s study (1995), the Chinese immigrant mother hopes for her Chinese American daughter to understand the excessive care and love as the nurture training, so that later on a daughter reproduces the nurturing behavior, and somehow takes care of the old mother (348). However, Ruth has been socialized in the American society, in which she has been trained to believe that the elders should be taken care of by professionals. Therefore, the concept of traditional Chinese mothering that GaoLing is trying to impose on Ruth is not applicable in the American society. Additionally, Pan and her co-researchers (1994) remark in their book that the Chinese descendants are supposed to adhere to the family obligation, which expects them to care for their aging parents (67). The study also reveals that the Chinese descendents intentionally show their filial piety according to Confucian values (67). Furthermore, the Chinese descendants are expected to speak Chinese to their aging parents, by means of showing their ability to maintain the Chinese culture. In short, these ideas of filial piety and the maintaining the Chinese culture are also postulated by Chao in her Chinese immigrant mothering principles.

Politeness is another factor that distances Ruth’s Americanized perception from her Chinese mother’s perception. Ruth and her mother understand politeness differently. The politeness in Chinese mother’s character is found in Tan’s The Bonesetter’s Daughter, which appears to be problematic in the eyes of her Chinese American daughter. In her forties, Ruth discovers two dozen of perfume with label “toilet water” remaining untouched in her mother’s bathroom (123). She wonders why her mother collects such a huge collection of perfume so she asks her mother. Then LuLing gives her reason that she has to be polite to her sister GaoLing so she receives the insulted stinky water. GaoLing, who also married an American man, has more westernized idea than LuLing. GaoLing believes that the perfume is a proper gift for her beloved elder sister whereas LuLing thinks the “l’eau de toilette” perfume originates from the toilet water. LuLing believes that GaoLing intentionally gives this perfume to her. Without trying to explain the actual origin of the perfume, Ruth gives her mother a suggestion about being polite to others by saying,

“Well, if you don’t like it,” Ruth once said, “why do you always tell them it’s just what you wanted?”

“How I cannot show polite?”

“Then be polite, but throw it away later if it bothers you so much.”

“Throw away? How I can throw away? This waste money!”

“Then give it away.”

“Who want such thing? Toilet water!—peh!—like I big insult them.” (152)

Ruth compromises the conflict by trying to find a solution for her mother. Meanwhile, LuLing always believes in accommodating; she gives up her need and wishes to satisfy others. She adheres to the traditional Chinese mothering, which promotes politeness. She always behaves politely even if she has to suffer from it. Chao’s study (1995) imparts that the traditional Chinese mothering emphasizes that the Chinese mother educates the child to respect and love others (344). In these terms, the mothering principle also looks for the Chinese children’s politeness. At the same time, the Chinese mothers have to foster their children to get along with others (Chao, 1995: 344). In so doing, the Chinese mothers must be a good role model for their children. Thus, LuLing has never rejected GaoLing’s perfume because she believes that her denial would show that she is impolite. LuLing just simply needs to get along well with others, especially with her only half-sister, and be the role model for her daughter Ruth in order that Ruth can assimilate into the American society but still be able to maintain traditional Chinese culture. LuLing’s unexplainable politeness later affects Ruth because she does not understand the real intention of being polite. Eventually, Ruth thinks she is supposed to be accommodating in order to please others. As Chao (1995) postulates, the Chinese immigrant mothers extremely impose the idea of being polite on the children’s mind that they even thinks that they are supposed to be polite to matter how suffer they are (348).

When the Chinese mother nurtures her daughter with exquisite care, she is the first one who notices her daughter’s trouble. Due to the filial piety, the daughter somehow thinks that she is supposed to be self-reliant and that she has to solve the trouble without consulting her mother. In Tan’s novel, Ruth has a conflict with her boyfriend and she moves to live with her mother for a week. At first, LuLing does not know Ruth’s problematic relationship with her co-habit because Ruth distracts her mother to draw animal pictures for a children’s book. Ruth thinks this drawing would make her mother happy. Unfortunately, Ruth notices that her mother’s illness causes her more heartache than her problems with her boyfriend. She cannot deal with the pain seeing her mother suffer from Dementia, so she cries. Ruth’s crying signifies that she acknowledges the importance of her mother’s memory about China. Having a hyphenated identity, Ruth cannot live without being excluded from both her mother’s memory and the Chinese connection.

On the other hand, LuLing tries to compromise the conflict by asking her daughter to explain the figure of hippo to her in Chinese. Ruth cannot do it because she does not know the word “hippo” in Chinese. Chinese immigrant mothers admit in Chao’s study that they intend to teach their children to be honest in order that their children, in the future, can be true to themselves and be strong to face the tough problems in the U.S. Ruth comes to stay overnight with LuLing because she figures out that her mother needs her and she has a conflict with her boyfriend. Even if Ruth is now 42 years old, she still avoids answering her mother’s questions about her boyfriend by asking her mother to draw an animal picture for Ruth’s illustrative children book. Ruth, then, asks her mother to draw a hippo for her. Unfortunately, LuLing does not know what a hippo looks like. LuLing keeps asking Ruth to try to explain the figure to her. Ruth does not want to cause any trouble, so she tells her mother to draw an elephant instead. LuLing teaches Ruth not to give up by saying, “Why you give up? Something hard maybe worth more than easy” (344). LuLing starts to guess whether the hippo has a horn on the head. Ruth denies by saying,

“That’s a rhinoceros. That’s good too. Do a rhinoceros, then.”

“Not hippo?”

“Don’t worry about it.”

“I not worry! You worry! I see this. Look your face. You not hiding from me. I know. I your mother! Okay-okay, you don’t worry hippo anymore. I worry for you. Later I remember, then tell you, you be happy. Okay now? Don’t cry anymore.” (344)

Ruth is used to her unspeakable problem and she has never consulted her mother. Meanwhile, LuLing tries her best to take the first step in mending her daughter’s conflict with Art, the European American co-habit. As Chao (1995) remarks, the Chinese immigrant mothers admit that they believe in educating their children to be self-reliant and strong, because their children have to be able to encounter all the tough problems in the American society (345).

Nevertheless, Ruth’s denial of the truth signifies that she has to be accommodating again in order not to make her mother worry about her relationship. Ruth shows her confusion and misunderstanding in traditional Chinese mothering through her unspeakable issue. Her mother’s dislocation of mothering affects Ruth in that she is unable to express her true needs to her mother directly because she values her mother’s needs rather than her own needs. If Ruth were born to a European American mother, she might have been able to express herself more directly. According to Chao (1995), the European American mothers teach their children to be individualistic which focuses on the children’s self-expression (341). It is equally important for the Chinese descendants to be able to understand their mother’s Chinese as the language and its context. One may suggest that to overcome this language barrier, Ruth should try harder to explain to her mother both about the illness and about the hippo figure. If Ruth had paid more attention in listening to LuLing’s mothering in the value of hardworking, she could have been able to tell her mother what is happening to her. Eventually, Ruth will be able to find the solution to her problems only if she speaks honestly to her mother.

When a mother tries to help her daughter out of a problem by helping her daughter find a solution, the daughter perceives her mother’s behavior as a control and then attempts to resist. Since her childhood, Ruth believes that she has to be self-reliant and solving every problem by herself. Consequently, it becomes extremely difficult for her to consult her problem with her mother. Ruth has to deny the truth about her relationship with Art that it has nothing to do with her mother because she is too concerned about her mother’s feelings. If Ruth were a daughter of a European American mother, who teaches the child to be able to express her feelings as individuals, this conflict would not have happened. In Tan’s novel, there is a scene that portrays such conflict between mother and daughter. Ruth comes to stay overnight at LuLing’s place. A week later, LuLing is curious why Ruth’s staying with her instead of staying with Art. LuLing blames herself for Ruth’s arguing with Art:

“Why you and Artie argue?”

“We’re not arguing.”

“Then why you not live together? This because me? My fault?”

“Of course not.” Ruth said this a bit too loudly.

“I think maybe so.” She gave Ruth her all-knowing look. “Long time ’go, you first meet him, I tell you, Why you live together first? You do this, he never marry you. You remember? Oh, now you thinking, Ah, Mother right. Live together, now I just leftover, easy throw away. Don’t be embarrass. You be honest.” (347)

Ruth adopts the American lifestyle by living in with her Ukraine American boyfriend. The idea is unacceptable for LuLing who adheres to the traditional Chinese mothering. For Ruth, her mother warning has robust power over her own thoughts and her feelings. As a caretaker, LuLing always warns Ruth about any kinds of harm she could encounter. After Ruth has listened to her mother’s warning telling her to be honest, she suddenly realizes her true feelings about her relationship with her mother. Ruth gradually recalls how much her mother worrying about her by listening to her mother’s warning. Meanwhile, LuLing still teaches Ruth to be honest to her no matter what happens and to maintain harmonious relationship with others by considering other’s needs rather than her needs. Although LuLing’s words seem to be an order for Ruth, her real intention is to communicate her concerned feeling about her daughter about being on the right track. LuLing encourages Ruth to be honest to herself and her mother. LuLing teaches Ruth as if she were an innocent child who needs guidance all the time. This is what a Chinese mother is always supposed to be while mothering her child. LuLing even affirms the idea that Ruth should listen to her suggestion about marriage. According to traditional Chinese mothering, Chinese descendants are supposed to obey their parents while making decisions. LuLing tries to prove that her daughter should follow her suggestion although Ruth is now a 42-year-old woman. For a Chinese mother, her daughter remains innocent no matter how old she has become.

In traditional Chinese mothering, the relationship between the Chinese descendants and other people in general is significant because it enables them to assimilate into the American society. According to Chao’s findings (1995), Chinese immigrant mothers often values the children contact with others (344). The idea of child’s maintaining and creating good connection with others is the key to success in Chinese immigrant mothering. To have harmonious relationship with others, the Chinese descendants are supposed to be honest. According to Pan et al. (1994), most Chinese immigrant mothers admit that they do not agree with their daughters living together with their partners before marriage (73). In Ruth’s case, it is obvious that Ruth is affected by the traditional Chinese mothering to which her mother adheres. After Ruth has lived with her Ukraine American boyfriend for a while, Ruth realizes that she should have trusted her mother in the first place. The discrepancy in Ruth’s perception of marriage and LuLing’s causes them to quarrel over the matter of Ruth-Art relationship. In fact, Ruth needs her mother’s approval in her relationship with Art. Therefore, LuLing’s disapproval makes Ruth feel uncertain whether to trust her own feelings or to believe her mother’s teaching about being honest. Yet again, Ruth does not want to share the story about her broken relationship with Art because LuLing does not like the idea of living together before getting married, which contradicts with the ideal of marriage in traditional Chinese mothering. Hence, it is difficult for Ruth to be honest to both her own feeling and to her mother’s.

The traditional Chinese mothering expects the mothers to educate their children to be self-reliant but the complicated principle may somehow be misinterpreted by the Chinese American children. This misinterpretation brings about a troublesome life to a character in Tan’s novel. Taught to be self-reliant, Ruth believes that she has to deal with every trouble on her own. Her mother’s mothering causes Ruth to become unable to make a precise decision. Ruth always feels doubtful about what choice she should make because she has been guided by her mother throughout her life. Ruth is used to her mother’s approval and life-time guidance. When she critically has to make a decision on her own, she could not make a decision without her mother’s guidance. There is a scene in which Ruth and her American boyfriend, Art, are arguing about their relationship. Art feels that Ruth tries to hide some secret from him so he asks her why Ruth keeps pushing him away. Ruth becomes angry because she hates whenever Art say something as if he knew her better than she does. Art tries to explain that he does not want Ruth to get angry, in fact, he says those words because he truly needs to know more about Ruth, the actual truth about her life. Ruth says, “If I want anything, it’s to know what’s possible to want” (389). Struggling between the dislocation of traditional mothering and the American socialization, Ruth is confused whenever she has to make a decision. She has to choose either to obey her mother or accomplish her own desire. LuLing’s mothering forces her to become doubtful in making a decision because she cannot make a decision without considering her mother’s wish. The typical self-reliance concept in Chinese immigrant mothering also affects Ruth’s personality. She brings forward her mother’s wish repeatedly that she cannot honestly clarify her true desire.

Acknowledging the difficulties of acculturation process into American society, the first generation Chinese immigrant mothers believe that being self-reliance would help their children to assimilate into American society easier. According to Chao’s theory (1995), the traditional Chinese mothering encourages the Chinese descendants to be self-reliant so that they are able to survive in the crucial world (345). However, Chao’s (1995) study reveals that the self-reliance in Chinese mothering still depends on two conditions, which are obeying the parents and being moralistic (345). Chao (1995) also remarks that the Chinese immigrant mothers teach their Chinese American children not to deviate from the morals or the mother’s teaching (348). When the daughter is pushed by the mother’s wishes for so long, she completely adheres to the mother’s wishes that she cannot identify her own wish. Therefore, the complicated implication of self-reliance in Chinese immigrant mothering applied in the U.S. affects the Chinese American daughter’s live while making decision, for she can satisfy neither her mother’s wish nor her own wish. Besides, Ruth has never learned how to express her own opinions that contradicts her mother. In Pan et al.’s book (1994), it is found that the American adolescence discuss their opinion when they disagree with a senior more openly than the Chinese adolescence (69). Consequently, Ruth ends up lacking self-confidence while making decision without her mother’s guidance. This mothering of LuLing causes Ruth to blame her mother for teaching her to be unsuccessful in being accepted by her European American boyfriend Art.

Mostly the conflict between mother and daughter occurs because of their misinterpretation of one another. The Chinese language nuance needs a great understanding and interpretation whereas the English language expresses the individual’s need more straightforwardly. Consequently, Ruth never understands the meaning of her Chinese and English names, for LuLing never told her from where name originates. Since her childhood, Ruth blames her mother for naming her the name she cannot pronounce because she does not understand its true meaning. LuLing gives Ruth the Chinese name which sounds similar to Ruth. LuLing usually calls Ruth as “Luyi,” or sometimes “Lootie.” This is because LuLing wants to maintain Chinese identity, but she has never told Ruth about her intention. Furthermore, LuLing giving a Chinese name to Ruth implies that this is her attempt to create a Chinese identity for her daughter. GaoLing tells Ruth a story about Sister Yu, who “could have come to America, but she let your mommy and me have this chance. That’s why your mommy named you after Sister Yu” (379). Previously, Ruth thinks that she is named after the orphanage owner, whose name is Ruth Grutoff. GaoLing clarifies that Ruth also has the Chinese name Luyi, which is derived from Sister Yu Luyi. GaoLing also adds that Luyi means “all that you wish” (379). Suddenly, Ruth realizes that her mother “put so much heart into naming her” (379). Ruth has hated her Chinese and American names since she was a kid; she thinks the sound of “Luyi” is similar to the name of a boy or a bully. Although Ruth “hate[s] both her American and Chinese name,” she has never asked her mother about its meaning (379). Ruth assumes the reason that her mother calls her “Luyi” is because her mother cannot fluently pronounce the name “Ruth” in English. As a matter of fact, LuLing has a good intention in naming Ruth and Luyi; she wants to remind herself of Miss Ruth Grutoff and Sister Yu Luyi who helped her coming to the U.S. Hence, this discovery creates bliss to Ruth; she understands her mother’s intention and mothering more than ever. As Chao (1995) notes, the Chinese immigrant mothers and their Chinese American children usually fight over the conflict because of their discrepancies in cultural values and language (273). Chao (2006) suggests that the children, who have been the language brokers for their parents, assume that the parents lack the language skill and unconsciously look down on them (275). Consequently, this evidence leads to the conclusion that Ruth thinks that her mother cannot pronounce her name, and therefore Ruth feels miserable about her mother. It has taken Ruth 40 years to know the meaning of her name. More interestingly, Ruth knows her name’s origin from her aunt GaoLing’s word not from her mother LuLing.

4.2   Solutions to the Mother-Daughter Conflicts in Tan’s The Bonesetter’s Daughter

As mention earlier, LuLing starts everything that happens in Ruth’s life. LuLing has been the one who helps Ruth form her identity. When a conflict occurs in her relationship with her daughter, LuLing is the first one who unknowingly causes a number of conflicts. LuLing is also the one who comes with solutions to her conflicts with Ruth. Those solutions derive from what she later realizes that something has to be done in order to mend her broken relationship with her daughter before she had completely lost all of her memory.

Tan suggests the very first solution to the conflicts between LuLing and Ruth, which are caused by their different perceptions, is to let Ruth read LuLing’s Chinese written story. When LuLing notices that she starts to lose her memory, she deliberately writes down all her memory about the life back in China into stacks of paper and gives them to Ruth. Unfortunately, Ruth does not acknowledge the value of Chinese culture that is woven so intricately into a story in Chinese. Besides, Ruth is unable to translate her mother’s written story. In order to influence Ruth to pay more attention to learning the Chinese language and maintain the Chinese culture, LuLing gives her written story in Chinese calligraphy to Ruth, claiming that it is “old things about my family” (13). Although LuLing acts as if it meant nothing, she adds another sentence saying, “My story, begin little-girl time. I write for myself, but maybe you read, then you see how I grow up, come to this country” (13). Ruth senses that her mother’s behavior, “the kind of awkward nonchalance,” implies that the story is important (13). For Ruth, her mother’s remembering the past suggests that she has lost the memories of the present day. Her mother’s recollection of the past experience in China means nothing to Ruth. Meanwhile, LuLing has an intention to write her story in Chinese; she wants her daughter to acknowledge the value of Chinese culture and the Chinese calligraphy because Ruth has never paid enough attention to study the calligraphy. In Chao’s findings (1995), the Chinese immigrant mothers contend that they want their Chinese American children to acknowledge the value of cultural origin, so they teach their children to maintain the Chinese culture (346). In doing so, they truly believe that the Chinese culture, especially the Chinese language, contains the context which needs to be implied. According to Yuan’s (1997) article entitled, “Semiotic of ‘China narratives’ in the Con/Texts of Kingston and Tan”, it is found that “Chinese immigrant mothers transliterate China into a secret text where daughters are excluded and to which only the mothers themselves have direct access” (161). Hence, Ruth has to find a mediator, Mr. Tang, who is a specialist in Chinese calligraphy to translate the story for her. In other words, it is very compelling that Ruth has to learn about her Chinese mother’s background through a mediator, Mr. Tang. Thus, LuLing’s solution to her conflict with Ruth is not completely effective because Ruth cannot understand every word in the Chinese language. As mentioned earlier, the Chinese language needs a great understanding and patience in interpreting. Thus, when Ruth has read her mother’s translated story, she gains more understanding about her mother’s dislocation of mothering as well as her mother’s estranged behavior. As McDaniels (2004) postulates, most Asian American daughters increasingly comprehend their mothers’ mothering and their mothers’ past by means of reading their mothers’ stories (30).

While reading her mother’s recollection, Ruth also acknowledges the importance of her mother’s lost memory. She then realizes that her mother’s memory serves as a device in connecting her to the Chinese identity. In this sense, Yuan (1997) admits in her article that the mother’s China narrative becomes an imaginary text of China with a “displace mentality and exile consciousness and conditioned by mother’s nostalgia” (161). LuLing is dislocated from her motherland when she migrated to the U.S. and found out that her life in the U.S. was too disappointing to be real. In the U.S. LuLing has lost her Chinese identity, her ancestor’s bones as well as her husband who had died in a car accident. Hence, LuLing adheres to the traditional Chinese mothering because she believes that her life back in China was better and real. LuLing does not accept the fact that she is now living in the U.S. and she perceives her life in the U.S. as a sorrowful life because she has sacrificed many valuable things in her life in order to immigrate to the U.S.

Besides reading her mother’s written story, Tan’s novel suggests that another solution for the conflict between mother and daughter is the need for a mother to be the first in helping her daughter’s problems. In a scene, LuLing tries to help Ruth teach filial piety to Ruth’s European American stepdaughters. LuLing is worried about Ruth’s boyfriend, Art, who has never taught Fia and Dory to “listen to” Ruth and “have more concern for” Ruth (Tan 75). She tries her best to instill in Ruth who tries to mother Fia and Dory with the traditional Chinese mothering principle. Ruth has read her mother’s written story about the origin of traditional Chinese mothering, so she understands her mother’s behavior in trying to help Ruth out from the conflict with her stepdaughters. Acknowledging the value of traditional Chinese mothering and her mother’s recollection, Ruth now turns to take her mother’s side by finding proper words in interpreting her mother’s teaching of filial piety.

Interestingly, the best solution for the dislocation of traditional Chinese mothering, which brings about the conflicts in mother-daughter relationship, is forgiveness from both sides. The forgiveness reconciles the broken relationship between mother and daughter. The daughter’s appreciation of the Chinese mother’s cultural background is not only the best solution, but the daughter should also be concerned about her mother’s feelings and should forgive for whatever they have been through for the mother’s happiness. As Paula J. Caplan (2000) remarks, the Chinese American daughters expect that their Chinese mothers would take the first step in mending the relationship, although mothers have to be disappointed at times so that they can recognize their daughters’ feelings of rejection and resistance (18). Meanwhile, the Chinese mothers also hope for their daughters’ forgiveness and great understanding. For many years of conflict between LuLing and Ruth, LuLing calls Ruth and speaks to her in Chinese that she needs Ruth’s forgiveness, as she says,

“I’m worried that I did terrible things to you when you were a child, that I hurt you very much. But I can’t remember what I did. . . .”

“There’s nothing—” Ruth began

“I just wanted to say that I hope you can forget just as I’ve forgotten. I hope you can forgive me, because if I hurt you, I’m sorry.”
After they hung up, Ruth cried for an hour she was so happy. It was not too late for them to forgive each other and themselves. (317)

It is obvious that Ruth is waiting for her mother’s taking the first step in solving the conflict as well as mending their relationship. LuLing, too, needs great understanding and forgiveness from Ruth because she has already lost her recollection and is wondering whether Ruth forgets about the conflicts. After LuLing gives Ruth the written story about her recollection, she hopes that Ruth would understand her reactions towards and against things under particular circumstances, which possibly hurt Ruth in the past. LuLing has never been forgiven by Precious Auntie, so she is struggling with her guilty conscience caused by her dreadful relationship with her mother. Thus, she believes that the forgiveness from her daughter would make her to become, at least, a good mother in traditional Chinese mothering. The traumatic experiences that LuLing encountered back in China, affect her condition as a mother. LuLing feels that her motherhood is unstable so she does not have self-confidence while mothering Ruth.

The dislocation of traditional Chinese mothering is the foremost cause that affects the mother-daughter relationship in Amy Tan’s The Bonesetter’s Daughter, particularly the Chinese immigrant mother LuLing and her Chinese American daughter Ruth. Ruth has to struggle dealing with her mother’s dislocation of traditional mothering and coping with the conflicts while living in-between position throughout her life. Ruth has been influenced by her American peers since her childhood, and throughout her life encountering the communication barriers. Thus, there are discrepancies in perceptions, languages, and cultural values in LuLing-Ruth relationship. Therefore, the conflict is unavoidable and emotionally intense. Some conflicts cannot be solved because Ruth does not express their true needs to her mother. Tan suggests that learning the Chinese language, Chinese cultural values and the historical background of the mother enable the daughter to understand her mother and the traditional Chinese mothering.

Copyright© Chiang Mai University, September 21st, 2009

CONCLUSION

In analyzing the text, it is found that dislocation of the traditional Chinese mothering has several compelling effects on the mother-daughter relationship, for example, the lifetime constraint on the Chinese immigrant mother, the resentment of Chinese American daughter against her mother and the cultural conflicts between the Chinese immigrant mother and her Chinese American daughter. The most difficult part in a mother-daughter relationship is to find harmony in their understanding for each other and to find a solution for their lifetime conflicts.

This research attempts to understand the difficulties of a Chinese immigrant mother like LuLing. It should be understood that LuLing is a woman with traumatic experiences in her childhood. LuLing’s mother committed suicide since LuLing was fourteen. She had not only dealt with the lack of care from her mother but also struggled to live in China and then immigrated to the U.S. hoping for a better life. One may suggest that she cannot be blamed for adhering to the traditional Chinese mothering, which is the only value that connects her to her motherland, China. The reason she maintains Chinese culture is that it makes her character strong which enables her to raise a child on her own and to earn money for financial support. Believing so, LuLing chooses to maintain traditional Chinese mothering while raising Ruth, but she seems to pay less attention to the fact that, she and her daughter are living in the U.S. Consequently, her dislocation of mothering affects her relationship with her daughter. Furthermore, she has more stress than other mothers, who grow up in intact families. Besides, LuLing must rely on her own resources in managing her work and mothering Ruth and to live her dislocated life with the haunting memory about Precious Auntie and the past life back in China.

However, the research argues that the mother should take a step back from the total control on the daughter’s life when the time has come. Chodorow (1978) remarks that the quality of mothering does not matter, if the mother cannot “give up this total control,” the child would end up in two possible ways – - either the child “remains permanently regressed and merged with” his/her mother, or the child “must totally reject” his/her mother (84). As Tan suggested in her novel, most conflicts happens between LuLing and Ruth because Ruth cannot endure LuLing’s intensive care anymore, and LuLing cannot give up her mothering of Ruth either. Thus, Ruth’s behavior has changed when she found a new cultural value, the American cultural value. Ruth’s adoption of the American culture helplessly leads LuLing to believe that her daughter is rejecting her. Conflicts between Ruth and LuLing might have been avoided, if LuLing had somehow adjusted herself into American society as her sister, GaoLing, had.

As pointed out in the analysis, LuLing initiates everything in Ruth’s life. At first, LuLing is the cultural carrier, who enables Ruth to have a connection to the Chinese culture and China. As a cultural carrier, LuLing unconsciously helps Ruth in developing her identity formation. Without being asked for help, LuLing lends her hand in assisting Ruth to deal with only troubles that come to her life. LuLing also teaches Ruth how to read and write the Chinese calligraphy. LuLing’s memory also serves as a cultural device for Ruth to value the traditional Chinese mothering.

Through reading LuLing’s storybook, Ruth learns about her mother’s burden past and what makes her mother’s life miserable. She also acknowledges the importance of the traditional Chinese mothering and the importance of the cultural roots. The interrogation of her mother’s past enables Ruth not only to understand her mother behavior but also to give her strength to seek for her own pleasure. The text foregrounds the importance of knowing the past which could pave the way to the daughter’s self-empowerment.

As for Ruth, her character develops in two stages. First she rebels against her mother’s mothering, and after reading her mother storybook, she figures out that her mother “simply want[s] to be essential, as a mother should be” (344). LuLing’s recollection enables Ruth to understand her mother’s adhering to traditional Chinese mothering. Ruth has gradually changed to take her mother’s side whenever there is a conflict between her mother and other Americans. She pays more attention to learning from her mother’s written story about “how to translate her mother’s heart” (168). Furthermore, Ruth even decides to maintain the traditional Chinese mothering while raising her European American stepdaughters although she clearly knows its negative effects. However, Ruth’s stepdaughters would not end up struggling in mother-daughter conflicts as Ruth did, because they have Art, their father who would help the children finding a balance in two cultures.

Although Tan does not emphasize the father’s role in the mother-daughter conflict, this research would suggest that the father might somehow help the mother and the daughter solve the conflict. As Chodorow (1978) mentioned, “the father represents reality to the child,” for he has been perceived by the child as a separated self (80). Thus, Ruth might have received suggestion for solving her conflicts with her mother from her father, if he had had been alive. Ruth’s life might have been easier for her, if her American father had not died in the car accident. Had had a father, Ruth might not have to face the cultural shock when she goes to school. Her father would have helped Ruth solve her problem by giving some suggestion about the American culture. Tan’s novel suggests that Ruth’s conflict coping strategies relies on her mother’s traditional Chinese mothering. When having problems, Ruth learns to turn to her friends for advice. In doing so, Ruth usually ends up with unsolved problems between herself and her American peers. In other words, Ruth should have learned to solve her conflicts with her mother in the first place and then find a way to apply the conflict coping strategies to the American context.

Gradually, Tan’s suggests solutions to the conflicts between LuLing and Ruth including (1) daughter’s reading the mother’s written recollection, (2) mother’s taking the first step mending the broken relationship and help her daughter to overcome the problems, and (3) mother’s asking for daughter’s forgiveness. Perhaps, it is also possible if the daughter has an attempt in understanding her mother’s background and her mother’s treatment of her. Ruth also has an attempt to ask for her mother’s forgiveness. She once writes down in her diary, “I’m sorry. Sometimes I just wish you would say you’re sorry too” (166). Ruth feels less guilty to write this down although she knows that her mother would never have a chance to read these words.

Amy Tan’s The Bonesetter’s Daughter can be further used as a text for literary analysis on various issues apart from those mentioned earlier. It could be used to compare with other novels written by other Chinese American women writers in terms of symbols represented in the novels. On the other hand, the theoretical framework of this research can also be used to conduct another literary analysis of some other novels. Moreover, Chinese American women writers’ autobiographies are worth being discussed on various issues, for example, the power of the written language and spoken language, burden of the past among Chinese immigrant women, and intergenerational conflict. Nevertheless, the male characters, who encounter the intergenerational conflicts in other novels, can be an interesting topic to study. Besides analyzing the conflicts that male characters encounter, their conflict coping strategies are equally significant to be further discussed. It is hoped that this research would shed the light on how to cope with conflicts between mother and daughter, particularly Chinese immigrant mother and her Chinese American daughter.

Copyright© Chiang Mai University, September 21st, 2009

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Family Trees of the Characters in Tan’s The Bonesetter’s Daughter